by Helena Escalante | Accountability, Creativity, Goals, Growth, Habits, Mindset, Opportunity, Tools
Estimated reading time: 3 minutes, 42 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: Pick Yourself
— From The Icarus Deception: How High Will You Fly? by Seth Godin
In yesterday’s post, the closing quote by author James Altucher was, “Rejection and the fear of rejection is the biggest impediment we face to choosing ourselves.” It reminded me of the importance of dancing with fear and picking ourselves, because no one else will.
We seem to spend an inordinate amount of time waiting to be picked, but the moment we pick ourselves is when we start creating, achieving, and moving forward. Because of this, I wanted to share with you a wonderful passage from the book The Icarus Deception by Seth Godin. Here it is, verbatim:
* * *
Pick Yourself
Pick Yourself by Hugh MacLeod @gapingvoid (click to enlarge)
Authority?
You want the authority to create, to be noticed, and to make a difference? You’re waiting for permission to stand up and speak up and ship?
Sorry, there’s no authority left.
Oprah has left the building. She can’t choose you to be on her show because her show is gone.
YouTube wants you to have your own show now, but they’re not going to call you.
Dick Clark has left the building. He’s not going to be able to get you a record deal or a TV gig because he and his show are long gone. iTunes and a hundred other outlets want you to have your own gig, but they’re not going to call you, either.
Neither is Rodney Dangerfield or the head of programming at Comedy Central. Louis C. K. has famously proven that he doesn’t need the tyranny of the booker—he booked himself. Marc Maron didn’t wait to be cast on Saturday Night Live—he started his own podcast and earned a million listeners.
Our cultural instinct is to wait to get picked. To seek out the permission, authority, and safety that come from a publisher or a talk-show host or even a blogger who says “I pick you.”
Once you reject that impulse and realize that no one is going to select you—that Prince Charming has chosen another house in his search for Cinderella—then you can actually get to work.
The myth that the CEO is going to discover you and nurture you and ask you to join her for lunch is just that, a Hollywood myth.
Once you understand that there are problems waiting to be solved, once you realize that you have all the tools and all the permission you need, then opportunities to contribute abound. The opportunity is not to have your résumé picked from the pile but to lead.
When we take responsibility and eagerly give credit, doors open. When we grab a microphone and speak up, we’re a step closer to doing the work we’re able to do.
Most of all, when we buckle down, confront the lizard brain, and ship our best work, we’re becoming the artists we’re capable of becoming.
No one is going to pick you. Pick yourself.
* * *
Click to enlarge.
Beautifully said. And so true. I am lucky to have one of the printouts of this passage that Seth Godin gave me. It’s a treasure that hangs on the wall of my office. It inspires me every day and motivates me to pick myself, and I want to share it with you in hopes that it will do the same for you. Click on the image on the left to enlarge and print.
What about the lizard at the end?? That’s a reminder of quieting and ignoring your lizard brain as you pick yourself and move in the direction of your dreams. Unless you are in true danger, think of your lizard brain the same way you would of a worrywart aunt: thank her for sharing her (doom and gloom) point of view, and don’t pay attention to it.
“How much responsibility are you willing to take before it’s given to you? – Seth Godin
ACTION
TODAY: Pick yourself! The world needs your gifts. And you’ve been wanting to share them for a long time… Start today.
FUTURE: Create the habit of picking yourself. It’s not a one-and-done thing, it’s a recurrent mindset and attitude to be developed. For those of us who struggle thinking that picking ourselves is arrogant or presumptuous, let me turn it around in the same way it helped me: it’s not selfishness, it’s responsibility, because it’s what will enable you to help yourself and others achieve goals and dreams.
Love this post as much as I do? Please help me spread the love by sharing it with other people so that they can pick themselves! Email, Facebook or Twitter.
by Helena Escalante | Accountability, Goals, Growth, Habits, Mindset, Planning, Tools
Estimated reading time: 3 minutes, 35 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: Ask these questions to describe your successful, ideal life
— From No Excuses!: The Power of Self-Discipline: 21 Ways to Achieve Happiness and Success by Brian Tracy
Each one of us has a different definition of success, yet we will all likely agree that no matter what our definition is, the pursuit and attainment of that success will bring us happiness. In his book No Excuses!, business guru Brian Tracy cites Aristotle as saying that the great question each of us must answer is, “How shall we live in order to be happy?”
He goes on to say, “Your ability to ask and answer that question correctly for yourself—and then to follow where your answer leads you—will largely determine whether you achieve your own happiness, and how soon.”
And to get there as soon as possible, we can start by defining what success looks like for each of us. Tracy suggests asking the following questions and answering them as if you could wave a magic wand and make your life perfect in every way.
If your business, work, and career were ideal in every way, what would they look like?
What would you be doing?
What sort of company would you work for?
What position would you have?
How much money would you earn?
What kind of people would you work with?
And, especially, what would you need to do more or less of to create your perfect career?
If your family life were perfect in every way, what would it look like?
Where would you live, and how would you be living?
What kind of a lifestyle would you have?
What sort of things would you want to have and do with the members of your family?
If you had no limitations and you could wave a magic wand, in what ways would you change your family life today?
If your health were perfect, how would you describe it?
How would you feel?
How much would you weigh?
How would your levels of health and fitness be different from what they are today?
Most of all, what steps could you take immediately to begin moving toward your ideal levels of health and energy?
If your financial situation were ideal, how much would you have in the bank?
How much would you be earning each month and each year from your investments?
If you had enough money that you never had to worry about finances again, how much would that be?
What steps could you take, starting today, to create your ideal financial life?
Why aren’t you already as successful as you would like to be, and what one discipline would help you the most to achieve all your goals?
What one skill could you develop that would help you to realize more of your goals?
If you could wave a magic wand and be completely disciplined in one area, which one discipline would have the greatest positive impact on your life?
As you begin to lay out your vision of success, pay attention to the very last question in each category (the things that you should be doing more or less of) and the very last three questions.
Self-discipline is the key to achieve what you want; however, it’s very important to lay out a plan first, so that you can then follow it with your self-discipline. For this, Tracy focuses on the Law of Cause and Effect, or sowing and reaping: “This law says that if you want to achieve success in any area, you must determine how success is achieved in that area and then practice those skills and activities repeatedly until you achieve the same results.”
Success guru Kop Kopmeyer aptly says that you must “learn from the experts [because] you will never live long enough to learn it all for yourself.” Remember that success leaves clues!
ACTION
TODAY: Set aside some time to answer the questions above and figure out what your ideal and successful life looks like. As you answer, a clear path will emerge and you will see what you need to do more or less of to head into the direction of your dreams.
FUTURE: Once you know what success looks like for you and what direction you need to go into, figure out who are the foremost, trusted experts in those fields, so that you can learn from them and follow in your footsteps.
Please share this post with someone who could benefit from answering all these questions to define their success, thanks! Email, Facebook or Twitter.
by Helena Escalante | Accountability, Creativity, Growth, Leadership, Mindset, Tools
Estimated reading time: 1 minute, 53 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: Model the best, remember the worst
— From LEAD RIGHT by Steve Ventura
There’s no question that we’ve all been exposed to many leadership lessons. These learnings come to us courtesy of the many leaders, both in business and in life, with whom we’ve interacted—or whom we have read about, watched on TV, or seen or heard from in other ways.
Steve Ventura, author of Lead Right, has a short, yet powerful idea to share with us today. He says:
“Think back on all the various people you’ve worked for. Some you’ll remember fondly—some not so fondly. Undoubtedly, some were ‘saints’… or at least they exhibited almost saintly behaviors. These were top notch leaders who showed you by their example, what you should be doing now. Emulate them; follow their lead. When in doubt, ask yourself ‘What would he do… how would she handle this situation?’ Then, DO IT!
Maybe your inventory of past bosses also includes one or two jerks… and you’d probably just as soon forget them. DON’T! You need to remember them clearly and frequently. They provide your best lessons on what NOT to do! By avoiding the kinds of behaviors they exhibited, you’ll make sure that, down the road, you never appear on any of your team members’ list of worst leaders.”
There you have it. As uncomfortable as it is to watch or to interact with people who are bad leaders, the lessons derived can be very valuable (albeit painful at times). Poor leaders are inverse mentors: they teach you how not to lead. Pay attention so that you remember to never do what they do.
Instead, emulate those leaders whose behavior consistently yields good results. Those are real role models and mentors.
“People seldom improve when they have no other model but themselves to copy after.” – Oliver Goldsmith
ACTION
TODAY: Recall an experience that you witnessed, whether at work or in your personal life, that was the result of poor leadership. What can you learn from it? What lessons can you derive so that you don’t make the same mistakes?
FUTURE: When faced with a difficult leadership decision or challenge, recall those leaders whose example you value and admire, and ask yourself how you think they would handle your situation. Then act accordingly.
Know someone who would enjoy reading this post? Please share it via email, Facebook or Twitter, thanks!
by Helena Escalante | Accountability, Goals, Growth, Leadership, Mindset, Opportunity, Planning, Tools
Estimated reading time: 4 minutes, 0 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: 3 Questions you must ask yourself to succeed in business
— From The 100 Absolutely Unbreakable Laws of Business Success by Brian Tracy.
In The 100 Absolutely Unbreakable Laws of Business Success, business guru Brian Tracy shares the Law of Critical Success Factors: “Every business has a number of key success factors that measure and determine its success or failure.”
Just as our bodies have indicators of vital functions that determine our health (heart rate, blood pressure, etc.), “companies have critical success factors, as well, which measure the health and vitality of an enterprise.”
Tracy says that many critical success factors are common to all businesses: “leadership, product quality, service, sales, marketing, manufacturing, distribution, and finance and accounting.” Excellent performance in each of these areas will bring about excellent results, whereas poor performance—or nonperformance—will seriously jeopardize the survival of the business.
Above and beyond these common critical success factors, some companies have their own factors that are specific to them. They are unique and they are what separates a particular company from the rest.
This last point brings about the first corollary of this law: “Each individual has personal critical success factors, the performance of which determines his or her business future.”
Tracy goes on to explain, “You have a set of key skills or core competencies that you use, like tools, to do your job. A weakness or failure in any of your key skills can undermine your overall effectiveness and weaken your ability to do your job effectively. To perform at your best, you must first identify the critical success factors of your work, measure your strengths in each one, and then develop a plan to become excellent in the areas that can help you the most.”
There are two questions that you must ask yourself in order to determine your personal critical success factors:
Why am I on the payroll? “What exactly have you been hired to accomplish? Why does the company pay you the money it does? Both you and your boss should be in complete agreement on this question. Whatever your answer is to this question, that is what you should be working on most of the time.” (Note: if it’s your own business, substitute the above with questions as if you were hiring someone to work in your position. It’s an eye-opening exercise, what exactly would this person work on most of the time?)
What can I, and only I, do that if done well will make a real difference to my company? “This is a task or responsibility that only you can do. If you don’t do it, it won’t get done. But if you do it and do it well, it can make a tremendous difference both to your company and to yourself.”
And these two questions bring about the second corollary to this law: “Your weakest critical success factor determines the height at which you can use other skills.”
What exactly does this mean?
“Your personal strengths and core competencies are what have brought you to where you are today. They are the foundations of your position and the determinants of your income. At the same time, your weaknesses form the ceiling on your ability to rise to even greater heights.”
To move ahead more rapidly, Tracy says, you must ask yourself—and be honest—about your weaknesses:
What are your weaknesses? “What one skill, if you developed and did it in an excellent fashion, would have the greatest positive impact on your career? Whatever the answer to this question, this is where you should begin to work on yourself. This is where you can get the biggest payoff in terms of increased competence.”
By asking these three questions, you will be able to determine where you currently stand and what you need to do to move forward to achieve your greatest business success.
ACTION
TODAY: Assess yourself. Tracy asks, “What are your personal critical success factors, and what is your plan to become absolutely excellent in the one area that can help you the most at this time?” Create a plan to start working on yourself in this area.
FUTURE: A great individual assessment and a book that can help you figure out your strengths is called Strengths Finder 2.0 by Tom Rath. Highly recommended. It will help you figure out your top 5 strengths so that you can build upon them. I’m happy to report that my biggest strength is learner (not that you hadn’t noticed…). A good outlet for expression for a learner is to share what he or she has learned, as a teacher, and this is another reason why this blog came to life, to be able to share what I learn. Check out the book and/or test and let me know in the comments here what your top strength is!
Know someone who needs to find his/her strengths? Please share this post via email, Facebook or Twitter, thanks!
by Helena Escalante | Accountability, Goals, Growth, Habits, Mindset, Planning, Tools, Wellbeing, Willpower
Estimated reading time: 3 minutes, 7 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: The one characteristic that unites enemies and strengths
— From The Artist’s Journey: The Wake of the Hero’s Journey and the Lifelong Pursuit of Meaning from Steven Pressfield
I love Steven Pressfield’s books. He has a knack for brevity, clarity and great wordsmanship that I admire enormously (and secretly wish I had).
In his great book The Artist’s Journey, the author makes a point of sharing and comparing the modern-day enemies that (most of us) share and the strengths that we all strive to have. The conclusion? The one thing that unites both our enemies and strengths is that they are all mental.
Don’t believe it? Check this out:
ENEMIES: “None of these enemies are real… they are all products of the mind.”
Fear of failure.
Fear of success.
Fear of the new, of pain, of loneliness, of exertion, of intensity.
Need for external (third-party) validation.
Self-doubt.
Arrogance.
Impatience.
Inability to defer gratification.
Predisposition to distraction.
Shallowness of thought and purpose.
Conventionality.
Insularity.
The need to cling to the known.
The best part of this, says Pressfield, is that we “confront no foes that are not of [our] own creation.” Yes, a pouncing lion or a man with a gun may be real, but we’re not talking about those absolutely true, physical dangers in here (if you confront either one of them, please run!).
We’re referring to our every day, mentally domesticated and cultivated, enemies. We have within ourselves the ability to defeat them: we’ve created these enemies in our heads and we can overcome them the same way.
But how do we overcome them?
By developing and nurturing strengths within ourselves. They are also a product of our mind. And while Pressfield rightly points out that none of the strengths listed below are innate, the good thing is that “all may be acquired by effort and force of will.”
STRENGTHS:
Courage.
Honesty, particularly with oneself.
Self-confidence.
Humility.
Compassion for oneself and others.
The ability to receive criticism objectively.
Patience.
Curiosity, open-mindedness, receptivity to the new.
The ability to focus.
The ability to defer gratification.
Will.
Mental toughness.
The capacity to endure adversity, injustice, indifference.
In computer science, the term GIGO stands for “garbage in garbage out.” This means that if you put flawed data in (=garbage), you get flawed data out. It’s the science equivalent of the old saying you reap what you sow.
Our mind works the same way. Feed it with the enemies described above and it becomes a fearful, selfish mess. Feed it with the strengths above and you will attain the best version of yourself. We could even coin the term VIVO: virtue in virtue out, or value in value out. (I was not able to find the opposite of GIGO anywhere… if you have a better option let me know in the comments here.)
The wonderful thing about all this is that it is up to us: we’re not subject to anything or anyone to get started and to cultivate and reap the rewards of the VIVO habit. Let’s go!
“Cultivation to the mind is as necessary as food to the body.” – Marcus Tullius Cicero
ACTION
TODAY: Pick one of the enemies from the list above or one that you are battling within. Pick a strength to overcome it. Think of an instance in the past in which you let the enemy rule and ponder how you could have overcome it with the strength. Please don’t use this as a way to beat yourself up, but instead as an opportunity to learn directly how to react the next time. It’s all a matter of awareness: the quicker you realize when your enemy is creeping up, the quicker you’ll be able to defeat it by bringing out the virtue/value with which you want to substitute it.
FUTURE: Make VIVO a habit that will help you cultivate and reap the best version of you.
Know someone who could use the concept of VIVO? Please share this post! Email, Facebook, Twitter. Thank you!
by Helena Escalante | Accountability, Collaboration, Creativity, Goals, Growth, Mindset, Opportunity, Tools
Estimated reading time: 3 minutes, 30 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: Success leaves clues
— From The Success Principles™: How to Get from Where You Are to Where You Want to Be by Jack Canfield
On this blog post, I mentioned that I was a big believer in the success leaves clues principle. A few of you asked me to talk more about that, and I am happy to do it.
The idea comes from Jack Canfield’s awesome book The Success Principles, and the premise is simple yet powerful:
“One of the great things about living in today’s world of abundance and opportunity is that almost everything you want to do has already been done by someone else,” says Canfield. “It doesn’t matter whether it’s losing weight, running a marathon, starting a business, becoming financially independent, triumphing over breast cancer, or hosting the perfect dinner party—someone has already done it and left clues in the form of books, manuals, audio and video programs, university classes, online courses, seminars and workshops.”
For virtually anything you want to do, there are plenty of books, courses, and many other resources on how to do it at your disposal. (Canfield put together this comprehensive list about books and audio programs on a variety of topics). There are also mentors, teachers, advisors, counselors, coaches, consultants and a host of other professionals and subject-matter experts who can lend a hand.
Canfield offers three ways to begin to seek out success clues in the area in which you are interested:
- Seek out a teacher, coach, mentor; a manual, book, audio program, or an Internet resource to help you achieve one of your major goals.
- Seek out someone who has already done what you want to do, and ask the person if you can interview him or her on how you should proceed.
- Ask someone if you can shadow them for a day and watch them work. Or offer to be a volunteer, assistant, or intern for someone you can learn from.
Canfield recalls a time when he was in conversation with a makeup artist whose dream was to open up a beauty salon. He suggested putting into practice No. 2 above: to take out a salon owner to lunch and ask how she had opened her own salon. To Canfield’s surprise, the makeup artist exclaimed, “You can do that?”
The answer is YES, by all means, you can certainly do that. 🙂 Yet I bet that at this point you are rejecting the idea with thoughts such as, Why would someone take the time to tell me what they did? Why would they teach me and create their own competition? To which Canfield responds, “Banish those thoughts. You will find that most people love to talk about how they built their business or accomplished their goals.”
And if you ask and the answer is no, don’t take it personally. No may simply mean that it’s a busy time and they may be willing to do it in the future. Ask and find out if you may contact them again at a better time. If not, simply move on and ask someone else.
A great exercise to overcome our fear and hesitation to do this to turn the experience around: imagine that someone who is looking at accomplishing what you have done comes to ask for your help. I’m sure you’d feel flattered and would at least accept a 10-15 minute call, if not a nice lunch, or a tour of your business or facility, right? It’s exactly the same the other way around. There’s plenty of goodwill, you just have to look for the clues and ask.
ACTION
TODAY: Start gathering success clues about what you’d like to do. Get a book, watch a video, listen to an audio program, or get a hold of some helpful resource. Also, make a list of people with whom you’d like to connect and ask for information. Reach out to them.
FUTURE: Adopt this success leaves clues principle as part of your repertoire of resources. You will never be at a loss for helpful information or guidance ever again knowing that you can always learn and follow in the footsteps of someone who has done what you want to accomplish.
Know someone who could benefit from learning that success leaves clues? Please share this post via email, Facebook or Twitter, thanks!
