by Helena Escalante | Growth, Habits, Leadership, Marketing, Mindset, Tools
Estimated reading time: 4 minutes, 5 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: Persuasion
— From The One Sentence Persuasion Course: 27 Words to Make the World Do Your Bidding by Blair Warren (you can read the short original document published in 2005 here)
In this short but powerful ebook, Blair Warren boils down the concept of persuasion to its most basic principles that go hand-in-hand with some basic human needs. And he encapsulates them in one sentence. “Not a sentence that one delivers, but a sentence that one remembers. A sentence that can help guide your efforts from beginning to end in virtually every situation imaginable.”
And what is that sentence?!
“People will do anything for those who encourage their dreams, justify their failures, allay their fears, confirm their suspicions and help them throw rocks at their enemies.”
Let’s take a quick look at these basic principles, “they are the tools for anyone who must connect with others and, more importantly, make these connections pay off.”
On encouraging their dreams…
“Parents often discourage their children’s dreams “for their own good” and attempt to steer them toward more “reasonable” goals. And children often accept this as normal until others come along who believe in them and encourage their dreams. When this happens, who do you think has more power? Parents or strangers?”
On justifying their failures…
“While millions cheer Dr. Phil as he tells people to accept responsibility for their mistakes, millions more are looking for someone to take the responsibility off their shoulders. To tell them that they are not responsible for their lot in life. And while accepting responsibility is essential for gaining control of one’s own life, assuring others they are not responsible is essential for gaining influence over theirs. One need look no further than politics to see this powerful game played at its best.”
On allaying their fears…
“When we are afraid, it is almost impossible to concentrate on anything else. And while everyone knows this, what do we do when someone else is afraid and we need to get their attention? That’s right. We tell them not to be afraid and expect that to do the trick. Does it work? Hardly. And yet we don’t seem to notice. We go on as if we’d solved the problem and the person before us fades further away. But there are those who do realize this and pay special attention to our fears. They do not tell us not to be afraid. They work with us until our fear subsides. They present evidence. They offer support. They tell us stories. But they do not tell us how to feel and expect us to feel that way. When you are afraid, which type of person do you prefer to be with?”
On confirming their suspicions…
“One of our favorite things to say is ‘I knew it.’ There is just nothing quite like having our suspicions confirmed. When another person confirms something that we suspect, we not only feel a surge of superiority, we feel attracted to the one who helped make that surge come about. […] It is a simple thing to confirm the suspicions of those who are desperate to believe them.”
On helping them throw rocks at their enemies…
“Nothing bonds like having a common enemy. I realize how ugly this sounds and yet it is true just the same. Those who understand this can utilize this. Those who don’t understand it, or worse, understand but refuse to address it, are throwing away one of the most effective ways of connecting with others. No matter what you may think of this, rest assured that people have enemies. All people. It has been said that everyone you meet is engaged in a great struggle. The thing they are struggling with is their enemy. Whether it is another individual, a group, an illness, a setback, a rival philosophy… when one is engaged in a struggle, one is looking for others to join him. Those who do become more than friends. They become partners.”
Lastly, in all of this information, did you notice there is something missing? YOU! “There isn’t a word about your wants, your needs, your hopes or your concerns. There isn’t a word about your offer or proposal. There isn’t a word about what you think. It is all about the other person… Can you even imagine how much more charismatic you will become when you come to be seen as the one who can fulfill some of their most basic emotional needs?”
ACTION
TODAY & FUTURE: Just as the sentence is simple, the action for today or the future is very simple too (yet not necessarily easy): whenever you need to prepare a document, a presentation, a campaign, sell a product, promote your business or your brand, or do any activity that requires persuading others, utilize one or more of the angles that the author mentions. Print the sentence and keep it handy so that you can reference it and use it often.
Do you want to persuade someone to read this blog? (Hint, hint!) Please encourage their dreams of professional growth and share with them via email, Facebook or Twitter, thank you!
by Helena Escalante | Growth, Habits, Leadership, Mindset, Resources, Tools
Estimated reading time: 2 minutes, 37 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: Whose business is this?
— From: Habit Changers: 81 Game-Changing Mantras to Mindfully Realize Your Goals by M. J. Ryan
We’ve all been in situations where colleagues or teammates are not doing their fair share of the work that has been assigned to them. Regardless of the reason for this, we’ve ended up doing their work. In the business world, especially, sometimes we fall into the trap of believing that it’s easier for us to do the work than to delegate it; or that that it will take less time and hassle for us to do the work than to train others. In both scenarios, we end up with more on our plate than we can truly handle.
“Do you often find yourself feeling responsible for other people’s behavior? Do you try to control other people’s reactions at work or at home? Have you found yourself rescuing others by doing their work for them? Making others look more responsible? Seem more approachable? Sound more reasonable?” If you have done any of this, don’t feel bad, we’ve all done it. We operate out of good will to steer things towards the best possible outcome, yet we need to let others pull their weight and we should not take the experience away from them.
M.J. Ryan, the author of Habit Changers suggests setting boundaries by asking the question, “Whose business is this?” and then figuring out the answer with Byron Katie’s method. Katie says, “There are three types of ‘business’ in the world: God’s [or nature’s] (floods, earthquakes and other random acts of nature, yours (you and your response to what life presents to you), and theirs (what is the other person’s to handle and respond to).”
Ryan further says that this simple question serves to set and clarify expectations, as it is useful in any relationship where we are deeply involved, such as when her daughter was a teenager. Asking, “Whose business is this?” helped remind Ryan that “[she] could support her [daughter], and [Ryan could] care deeply, but her [daughter’s] business [was] hers to sort out.”
So, if asking this question helps set boundaries for parents with teenagers, it will definitely do wonders for other business and life situations where life can get equally passionate and intense.
ACTION
TODAY & FUTURE: Keep this simple question handy in your mind. Ask, “Whose business is it?” when tempted to take over any situation and do the work for your loved ones, your colleagues or your teammates. The answer will give you the clarity that you need to respond to the situation in the best way possible, whether taking charge if it’s your business, or letting someone else do it if it’s their business.
Know someone who is always rescuing others and could benefit from applying today’s idea? Please share this post with that person via email, Facebook or Twitter, thank you!
P.S. I’m delighted to announce that I’m the next guest in the Creative on Purpose broadcast. Please join me next week, on April 12, 2018, at 12:00 pm EST (GMT -4) via Facebook Live. We’ll have fun talking about lifelong learning, expanding our minds, how to always keep growing and the importance of challenging ourselves continuously. Looking forward to seeing you there!
by Helena Escalante | Accountability, Collaboration, Goals, Growth, Habits, Leadership, Mindset, Tools
Estimated reading time: 3 minutes, 16 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: Believe
— From Extreme Ownership: How U.S. Navy SEALs Lead and Win by Jocko Willink and Leif Babin
The U.S. Navy SEALs are back, yay! In their fabulous book, Extreme Ownership, SEALs Jocko Willink and Leif Babin state that knowing the reasons why, understanding and, most importantly, believing in the ultimate goal, is the absolute basis for a team to work well together.
It begins with the leadership, but it must permeate to all levels of the team or organization. “In order to convince and inspire others to follow and accomplish a mission, a leader must be a true believer in the mission.” This resolute belief, the authors state, “is far more important than training or equipment. […] Actions and words reflect belief with a clear confidence and self-assuredness that is not possible when belief is in doubt.”
But what to do when belief is in doubt? It all boils down to one simple question: WHY? “Leaders must take a step back, deconstruct the situation, analyze the strategic picture and then come to a conclusion. If they cannot determine a satisfactory answer themselves, they must ask questions up the chain of command until they understand why.” When you don’t understand why your company established that new sales policy, ask why. When your client is giving you a particular instruction or a change in scope and path, ask why. When your favorite non-profit asks you to change your volunteer tasks, ask why. Leadership in this instance is wide and varied, and has nothing to do with rank.
At the same time, it is also important for you as a leader “to take the time to explain and answer the questions of [your] junior leaders so that they too can understand and believe… [you must] explain not just what to do, but why.” And also, goes without saying, but you must continually emphasize that you are open and accessible for your team members to further ask questions on their quest to understanding why and believing.
The authors share a case where many managers did not understand a new policy implemented by the CEO, and didn’t ask for clarification for fear of looking stupid (despite them all agreeing that the CEO was smart, experienced and not unreasonable). “People talk about leadership requiring courage. This is exactly one of those situations. It takes courage to go to the CEO’s office, knock on the door, and explain that you don’t understand the strategy behind the decisions. You might feel stupid. But you will feel far worse trying to explain to your team a mission or strategy that you don’t understand or believe in yourself. […] If you don’t ask these questions, you are failing as a leader and you are failing your team.”
And it goes both ways. It is the responsibility of the leaders to ensure that the team understands and believes; yet since leaders are not mind readers, the team members are also responsible for asking for clarification until they fully understand and believe too.
ACTION
TODAY: Where are you unclear about a directive? Who do you need to ask in order to understand and believe in the project or mission? Go ask why today, you’ll be glad you did! Conversely, if you recently started a project, who do you need to make sure is on board with you? Ask them if they need further clarification to fully believe in what you are doing.
FUTURE: I’ve found that Ask Me Anything (AMA) sessions at the beginning and end of a project—as well as throughout—are a wonderful source of information (above and beyond one-on-one sessions with team members). How can you make use of such sessions, that you can run in any scenario (from your family on the living room couch, to your teammates at work, to a group of volunteers at your favorite nonprofit, to your company’s Board members at the quarterly meeting) to make sure that everyone fully understands why, and thus is truly on board and believing in the mission?
Know someone who needs to believe? Please share this post with that person via email, Facebook or Twitter, thank you!
by Helena Escalante | Accountability, Collaboration, Creativity, Goals, Growth, Habits, Leadership, Mindset, Planning, Productivity, Time, Tools
Estimated reading time: 2 minutes, 40 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: Illusions of agreement
— From REWORK: Change the way you work forever by Jason Fried and David Heinemeier Hansson
Raise your hand if you’ve ever been involved in putting together a report that is still sitting on a shelf somewhere accumulating dust… Oh, geez, both of my hands are raised!
Fried and Hansson in their excellent book Rework, say, “The business world is littered with dead documents that do nothing but waste people’s time. Reports no one reads, diagrams no one looks at, and specs that never resemble the finished product. These things take forever to make but only seconds to forget.” So true.
What they suggest is removing layers of abstraction and “getting real.” But what does this mean?
“Instead of describing what something looks like, draw it. Instead of explaining what something sounds like, hum it. […] The problem with abstractions (like reports and documents) is that they create illusions of agreement. A hundred people can read the same words, but in their heads, they’re imagining a hundred different things.” That’s why this famous cartoon about a tree swing is so funny and so on point!
It is similar to when you and your friends read a book: you all have different ideas of what the characters look like in your heads. And when you all go see the movie, you know exactly what each character looks like. “That’s when you get true understanding” and only then, everyone is on the same page.
The authors go on to cite the case of Alaska Airlines building up the Airport of the Future. “They didn’t rely on blueprints and sketches, they got a warehouse and built mockups using cardboard boxes… The team then built a small prototype in Anchorage to test systems with real passengers and employees.” The result was a success, as it increased efficiency by decreasing wait times and passenger frustration.
But this doesn’t apply just to large projects. The book quotes renowned furniture craftsman Sam Maloof who “felt is was impossible to make a working drawing to show all the intricate and fine details that go into a chair or stool.” He would simply get out the appropriate tool for that job and start working on it.
What project are you working on now where you could take out your proverbial chisel? Let’s avoid the illusions of agreement and have something real that we can indeed agree on!
ACTION
TODAY: Take some time to think about the many projects you are working on. Which ones are being handled under illusions of agreement? Don’t feel bad, it’s natural to work that way as we’ve all been conditioned to think it’s the best way. But now that you now the benefits of getting real you can speed up your goal by avoiding the distractions that come with abstractions. (Ha! I’m a poet and don’t know it…)
FUTURE: Keep in mind the distractions and the time spent on illusions of agreement. Share this info with your team and clients. For each project that you start, big or small, get in the habit of asking yourself and those involved, How can we make this real? That will push you to find better ways to accomplish your goals.
Know someone who needs to get real? Please share this post via email, Facebook or Twitter, thank you!
by Helena Escalante | Creativity, Goals, Growth, Habits, Leadership, Mindset, Opportunity, Planning, Productivity, Resolutions, Tools
Estimated reading time: 2 minutes, 33 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: Leaders and limitations
— From Common Sense Leadership: A Handbook for Success as a Leader by Roger Fulton
As I was going about finding an idea for today, I came across this one that I loved: it’s what leaders do when faced with limitations. Normally, I intertwine my thoughts and takeaways with the idea from the book. Yet, on this occasion, the idea is so brief, so concise and so perfectly written, that I’m taking the liberty of sharing it in its entirety here. Since we are all leaders, whether formal or informal, paid or voluntary, of large corporations or of our households… I think the thoughts apply beautifully to all. Enjoy!
“Leaders understand their own limitations, but they are not necessarily limited by them.
As an example, budgets can limit available resources, but a true leader will find a way to get the job done with the resources available. Staffing three shifts can’t be done with only two people, but a true leader will make the most efficient use of those two people to cover the shifts.
Time is always a limitation. Rome wasn’t built in a day. Yet a true leader will make the most efficient use of time available. Luckily there are some things that know no limits:
Dreams.
Human ingenuity.
Love.
Even though you may not be able to conquer the whole world, you can comfortably conquer a small part of it, even taking into account many of your limitations.”
ACTION
TODAY: Think of some limitations or constraints that you are facing in business or life, and put them to work for you. What are some creative ways in which you can deal with them? How can you make the most out of them? Fortunately there’s no limit to human ingenuity: set some time to brainwrite, and remember that there’s no such thing as a shortage of ideas.
FUTURE: Let’s turn limitations upside down and use them to our advantage. Try imposing a few limitations on yourself or your work to see if you become more efficient and effective. For instance, try to answer most emails in less than 3 minutes (the email game). Or try to finish a particular project or chore in 25 minutes. Need more time? Add another chunk of 25 minutes as opposed to giving it all your morning. How about cutting down meeting time from the calendar’s default of 1 hour to 30 minutes instead, and do it standing up to further keep it short? Cut your daily cooking time in half and devote the other half to playing a game with your family or to start working on a personal project. You can be as adventurous or as traditional as you can with this. Create some limitations and put them to the test, see if they work for you and if you become more efficient as a result of them. Then you can decide whether to keep them or not, or tweak and keep testing until you find the ones that work really well for you.
Know someone who would benefit from reading this post? Please share it via email, Facebook or Twitter, thanks!
by Helena Escalante | Accountability, Goals, Growth, Habits, Leadership, Mindset, Planning, Time, Tools
Estimated reading time: 3 minutes, 51 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: The truth about multitasking
— From The ONE Thing: The surprisingly simple truth behind extraordinary results by Gary Keller with Jay Papasan (watch the book trailer)
Much has ben said about multitasking, both for and against it. In The One Thing, Gary Keller and Jay Papasan finally bust the myth: multitasking is a lie.
The book cites Clifford Nass, a professor a Stanford University, who set out to study multitaskers as he realized he did not possess the skill. “I was sure they had some secret ability,” he said, but at the end of the study, multitaskers “were outperformed on every measure. Although they’d convinced themselves and the world that they were great at it, there was just one problem… multitaskers were just lousy at everything.”
“The truth is multitasking is neither efficient nor effective.”
There is no doubt that we can indeed “do two or more things at once, such as walk and talk, or chew gum and read a map; but… what we can’t do is focus on two things at once. Our attention bounces back and forth [‘task switching’]… Switching between two simple tasks—like watching television and folding clothes—is quick and relatively painless. However, if you’re working on a spreadsheet and a co-worker pops into your office to discuss a business problem, the relative complexity of those tasks makes it impossible to easily jump back and forth. It always takes some time to start a new task and restart the one you quit… [and] the cost in terms of extra time from having to task switch depends on how complex or simple the tasks are.”
So, let’s set the record straight: we can do two things at once, but we cannot focus effectively on two things at once. Need more proof? Here’s a fun little game (you’ll need a stopwatch):
Say the alphabet out loud and time how long it takes you: A, B, C, D, E, F, G, etc.…
Now count to 26 out loud and time how long it takes you: 1, 2, 3,4, 5, 6, 7, etc…
I assume you had no problem doing both tasks, and that those are two things that you can do masterfully well, right?
Now intertwine them out loud and time how long it takes you: A, 1, B, 2, C, 3, etc…
What happened? Did you slow down at some point to figure out which letter corresponded with a number? Yep, that’s normal. Did you eventually give up before you finished because it was harder than you expected? Most people do. If you did go through the whole thing, I bet it took you much longer to do this letter-number combination than to say the alphabet followed by counting to 26 the first time.
This is exactly what happens when we are trying to switch from task to task, “[it] exacts a cost few realize [we’re] even paying.”
The book mentions that people who work with computers change windows, check email or switch programs close to 37 times per hour. This means less than 2 minutes devoted per task, and that is further reduced by the time that it takes to switch and (re)focus from one to the other. It’s no wonder we feel stretched to thin and squeezed for time when we are taking more time to get things done because of the lies we’ve been told about multitasking.
“Multitasking is merely the opportunity to screw up more than one thing at a time.” – Steve Uzzell
The authors then ask: if we wouldn’t allow a pilot or a surgeon to multitask, and instead demand full focus from them, “Why are we living another standard? Do we not value our own job or take it as seriously? Why would we ever tolerate multitasking when we’re doing our most important work? Just because our day job doesn’t involve bypass surgery shouldn’t make focus any less critical to our success or the success of others. Your work deserves no less respect.”
Eye opening, isn’t it?
ACTION
TODAY: Don’t feel bad if you get distracted, we all do. Simply bring your focus back to the task at hand and focus solely on that until you get it done, or until which point you are done with what you needed to do (say, now you have to wait for a coworker to give you his part of the slide deck). Repeat with your other tasks.
FUTURE: Build the habit of focusing and not switching from task to task. Remember the alphabet-number game: combining tasks or switching from one to another takes additional time that you may not realize. Here are 11 Exercises That Will Strengthen Your Attention.
Know someone who needs to stop multitasking? Tell them to focus on this post by sharing it via email, Facebook or Twitter, thanks!
