by Helena Escalante | Goals, Growth, Habits, Mindset, Tools
Estimated reading time: 3 minutes, 6 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: Creatures of habit
— From The Compound Effect: Jumpstart Your Income, Your Life, Your Success by Darren Hardy
In The Compound Effect, Darren Hardy tells a tale of a wise teacher who was walking through the forest with a young student. They both stopped and the teacher instructed the student to pull up a sapling, which the student did easily with his fingers. Then the teacher pointed to a taller sapling, about knee-high to the student, and instructed the boy again to pull it up. He yanked it up and out came the taller sapling with its roots. The teacher then pointed to a third tree, yet this one was as tall as the student. With much effort the boy pulled it up. The youngster had to throw himself mightily into the task and do it with all his body weight, as well as with sticks and stones to pry up and loosen the roots.
The teacher pointed next to a tall and majestic oak tree. The boy, seeing the oak and assessing the tremendous struggle he had just gone through to pull up the previous (and much smaller) tree, replied, “I am sorry, but I can’t.” To which the teacher said, “My son, you have just demonstrated the power that habits will have over your life! The older they are, the bigger they get, the deeper the roots grow, and the harder they are to uproot. Some get so big, with roots so deep, you might hesitate to even try.”
“We are what we repeatedly do.” – Aristotle
We are all creatures of habit, and I love this story because it paints a great picture of the power and strength of our habits. Hardy writes, “Psychological studies reveal that 95 percent of everything we feel, think, do, and achieve is a result of a learned habit.” The key here is learned, because we weren’t born with habits… “Since you learned every habit you have, you can also unlearn the ones that aren’t serving you well.”
Easier said that done indeed, but it can be done. We might need a crane, many chainsaws and a full crew to chop down a big proverbial tree (as in this video of a real tree), but “with enough practice and repetition, any behavior, good or bad, becomes automatic over time.” Might as well make it a good behavior if it’s going to get that deeply rooted!
Hardy embodies good habits himself and, as the former publisher of SUCCESS magazine, has met and worked with many great achievers, CEOs, and superstars. He says that the one thing they all share is a routine with good habits. “That’s not to say they don’t have bad habits; they do. But not many. A daily routine built on good habits is the difference that separates the most successful amongst us from everyone else. And doesn’t that make sense? […] Successful people aren’t necessarily more intelligent or more talented than anyone else. But their habits take them in the direction of becoming more informed, more knowledgeable, more competent, better skilled and better prepared.”
Happy habit formation!
ACTION
TODAY: Take a look at your habits and decide if there is one that you need to build or uproot. Determine what is the smallest action that you can take in that direction and do that today.
FUTURE: As you establish a completely new habit or change an old one, make sure you keep track of your actions in that direction. Keeping track will help you determine whether you are on the right path or further changes are necessary. Also, you may want to get an accountability buddy to help you out.
Know someone who could use a daily routine with good habits? How about sharing this post with that person? Send it to him or her via email, Facebook or Twitter, thanks!
by Helena Escalante | Accountability, Collaboration, Goals, Growth, Habits, Mindset, Planning, Time, Tools
Estimated reading time: 3 minutes, 3 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: Don’t hold yourself accountable
— From The Art of People: 11 Simple People Skills That Will Get You Everything You Want by Dave Kerpen
Dave Kerpen, author of The Art of People tells a story in which the members of his eight-person entrepreneurial group kept missing each of their goals.
This was a group that met monthly, and over the previous year, the members of the group had been working on achieving some personal goals. However, these eight successful and driven, otherwise super-achievers, were not hitting the mark.
As they were wondering what was happening for them to keep coming short of their goals, one of the members named Ben said, “We’re not hitting our goals because we’re not accountable enough. Starting today, we’ll each have a goal accountability partner. You are to check in with your partner at least once a week. First up, reassess all goals together and make sure they’re SMART goals (Simple, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic and Timebound). Then, instead of you updating the group at our monthly meeting with your progress, your partner will update the group on how well you’re doing and you will update the group on how well your partner is doing.”
What do you think happened over the next months? Yes, everybody hit their goals.
Instead of us holding ourselves accountable, Kerpen says, “we should be letting others hold us accountable for our successes and failures. Why? Because when you are accountable to another human being you trust and respect, it makes you want to work harder to achieve the goals you set.”
An additional advantage of being accountable to another person is that you realize how lame your excuses are: while in your mind a rainy day sounds reasonable enough not to go to the gym, your accountability partner won’t let you get away with it. Also, one accountability partner to help you and whom you can help is ideal, says Kerpen, because “when you’re accountable to too many people, it’s like being accountable to no one.”
This accountability-buddy system works particularly well in a business setting too. Kerpen gives us three keys to making this happen:
- Assign accountability partners who trust and respect each other.
- Set SMART goals together.
- Check in at least once a week, ideally twice a week, with one another.
Whether for business or personal goals, this last point on checking in doesn’t have to take long, a quick email will do—the important part is to be accountable to the other person.
Happy accountability!
ACTION
TODAY: Think about the benefits of finding an accountability partner. What goals are you struggling with that you’d like to see achieved with your buddy’s help? Make a call or send an email, and invite that person to help you in exchange for you helping as well. You don’t have to have a larger group to report to, it can be just the two of you. And it doesn’t have to take too much time: you can check in every week via email and visit by phone, video or in person once a month.
FUTURE: An accountability partner will help you achieve your goals and you will do the same for him or her. But how about those times when you have a very specific goal in mind? Think about a combo accountability and guidance. Could you find a partner to keep you accountable who can answer specific questions and guide you too? Could you do this for him/her too with your experience and expertise? This may need a bit more digging to find the right person, but it could be immensely helpful for both because you are exchanging accountability and expertise at once.
How about sharing this post with your accountability buddy? Send it to him or her via email, Facebook or Twitter, thanks!
by Helena Escalante | Accountability, Growth, Habits, Mindset, Tools
Estimated reading time: 3 minutes, 40 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: Use gratitude to snap out of a funk
— From The Compound Effect: Jumpstart Your Income, Your Life, Your Success by Darren Hardy
I recently had a particularly challenging morning and was stuck in a funk. Ugh. I went through a course years ago where the instructor called this “looping,” because you keep playing the same scene in your mind over and over in an endless loop (and yes, it drives you crazy and you can’t move forward, I certainly don’t recommend it…).
I did not have the time, or the willingness to let the funk take my day over in endless loops. I had a full day ahead of me, and I wanted to be at my best for it. I needed to find a way to snap out of the funk and, preferably, do it as fast as possible.
Fortunately, I had been reading earlier that morning The Compound Effect by Darren Hardy (you will definitely see some of its great ideas in here soon), and one of the things that struck me was a Gratitude Assessment (you can download a printable worksheet for free from here along with many other great, free resources that Hardy offers).
While the gratitude assessment is offered “to bolster your abundant mindset,” I thought I’d use it to help me change my mind and put things into perspective, which is what I needed at the moment. It worked like magic.
It’s wonderful what a little gratitude can do: I started out in a horrendous mood, and when I finished the exercise a moment later, I was in an infinitely better place, and feeling peaceful and grateful. The bad mood had disappeared. I was able to put my negative feelings in a “mental container” and keep them there (as opposed to letting them run wild in loops) for me to later do some reflective thinking and figure out the lessons I needed to learn from that experience. My gratitude to this exercise in gratitude!
Below is the assessment. As you will see, it’s very simple, but I encourage you to do it often (not just when you want to snap out of a funk). Once you do it, you’ll see how powerful and restorative it can be.
By the way, YOU are in my gratitude list. A wholehearted, BIG THANK YOU for being a part of the EntreGurus family and for being here today! 🙂
GRATITUDE ASSESSMENT
- 3 amazing people in my life are: ________________________
- 3 great things about my physical body are:________________________
- 3 great things about my home and where I live are: ________________________
- 3 great things about where I work and what I do for a living are: ________________________
- 3 great gifts of unique talent and skill I have been given are:________________________
- 3 great gifts of knowledge and experience that I have been given are: ________________________
- 3 ways in which I have experienced “luck” in my life are: ________________________
- 3 ways in which my life is wealthy, abundant and prosperous are: ________________________
And to make your day even better, I’ll leave you with this beautiful quote for you to ponder throughout the day:
“Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow.”
– Melody Beattie
ACTION
TODAY: Take a few minutes to do the gratitude assessment and see how much more wonderful your day gets!
FUTURE: Make it a habit to incorporate gratitude in your life daily, not just during Thanksgiving.* At the beginning of every day think of 3 persons/things that you are grateful for; and at end of every day do the same. And, of course, whenever you have a bad day and you need to snap out of a funk, come to this gratitude assessment and watch your bad day transform into a much better one.
Know someone who needs to adopt an attitude of gratitude? Please share this post with them via email, Facebook or Twitter, thank you!
* For international Gurupies**: Thanksgiving is a lovely holiday in the United States (the 4th Thursday in November) in which families get together to share a special meal, give thanks and appreciate all that they have, especially one another.
**Gurupie = blend of guru and groupie = how I fondly refer to the EntreGurus’ community, because we all follow the ideas of the gurus.
by Helena Escalante | Accountability, Growth, Habits, Leadership, Mindset, Planning, Tools
Estimated reading time: 2 minutes, 54 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: Reflective thinking
— From Thinking for a Change: 11 Ways Highly Successful People Approach Life and Work by John C. Maxwell
In Thinking for a Change, John C. Maxwell makes a very good case for why we should take time to reflect on our experiences, big and small, good and bad. He says that reflective thinking gives us valuable benefits such as true perspective, because as a result of reflecting, you can put an experience into perspective, evaluate its timing and appreciate things that went unnoticed before.
Also, our confidence in decision-making increases. “Have you ever made a snap judgment and later wondered if you did the right thing? Everybody has. Reflective thinking can help to diffuse that doubt. It also gives you confidence for the next decision. Once you’ve reflected on an issue, you don’t have to repeat every step of the thinking process when you’re faced with it again. You’ve got mental road markers from having been there before. That compresses and speeds up thinking time—and it gives you confidence.”
Another significant point is that reflective thinking takes experience and turns it into insight. Mark Twain is quoted as saying, “We should be careful to get out of an experience all the wisdom that is in it—not like the cat that sits down on a hot stove lid. She will never sit down on a hot stove lid again—and that is well; but also she will never sit down on a cold one anymore.”
Yet in our crazy world where there is little time and where reflection and self-examination don’t come naturally, how should we incorporate this practice to reap the benefits?
Maxwell suggests setting aside time for reflection, and making sure that we are removed from distractions and interruptions. He also suggests going over your journal, if you have one, but if you don’t, your calendar is a great tool to review where you’ve been, what you’ve done and the progress you’ve made.
The most important thing, however is to ask the right questions and to put the thoughts derived from our reflections into action. “The value you receive from reflecting will depend on the kinds of questions you ask yourself. The better the questions, the more gold you will mine from your thinking.”
When Maxwell reflects, he thinks about his values, relationships and experiences. Here are some sample questions he shares. Feel free to use what you need and modify however you see fit to suit your experience and style.
- What have I learned today that will help me grow?
- How and when can I apply it to my life?
- To whom did I add value today?
- How do I know I added value to that person?
- What did I do with someone else that made both of us better?
- Can we do something else together to continue our mutual success?
- Did I lead by example today?
- What did I encounter today to which I need to give more thinking time? Are there lessons to be learned?
- What went wrong? Could I have changed it? What do I need to do differently next time?
Happy reflecting!
ACTION
TODAY: Take a few minutes to reflect on your day today. Set aside some time and ask yourself questions. Based on the answers, set actions for the future. How did it go? What did you learn?
FUTURE: Set aside a specific time and place for your reflective thinking. Maxwell suggests doing this for 21 days to turn it into a regular practice.
Know someone who could benefit from reflective thinking? Please share this post with them via email, Facebook or Twitter, thank you!
by Helena Escalante | Habits, Mindset, Planning, Productivity, Resources, Time, Tools
Estimated reading time: 3 minutes, 39 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: Siesta, coffee and 5 steps to a perfect nap
— From WHEN: The Scientific Secrets of Perfect Timing by Dan Pink
I can’t take naps. Well, technically I can, but they always last between 3 and 5 hours with at least an additional 20-30 minutes to shake the grogginess and be fully awake. That rules them out of my regular life and leaves them either in the luxury category when I’m on vacation, or in the rescue category when I’m so sleep deprived that a nap is a preferred alternative to the state of zombieness.
Dan Pink, author of WHEN, had a similar dislike for naps: “when I’ve awoken from these slumbers, I usually feel woozy, wobbly and befuddled—shrouded in a haze of grogginess and enveloped in a larger cloud of shame.”
However, after doing research for his excellent book about timing, Pink changed his mind and became nap devotee. “Naps, research shows, confer two key benefits: They improve cognitive performance and they boost mental and physical health. […] The returns from napping extend beyond [alertness and] vigilance. An afternoon nap extends the brain’s capacity to learn… boosts short-term [and] associative memory… and improves our overall health.” (Hmmmm, I may try this after all, but clearly following Pink’s formula below, not mine…)
Pink found out that the so-called power naps—the ones that produce these great results—last anywhere between 10 and 20 minutes, no more. Once you wake up, you are fully rested and ready to take on where you left off. If you sleep longer, then sleep inertia (grogginess) kicks in and you’ll spend time trying to awaken your mind as Pink used to do: “splashing water on [his] face, shaking his upper body like a soaked golden retriever and searching desk drawers for candy to get some sugar into [his] system.”
There’s a further powerful secret that Pink shares from his research, and you can use it to boost your mental alertness by the time you wake up: caffeine. Most likely in the form of coffee. But it’s not coffee ingested after waking up, instead, it’s taken before your nap.
Whaaaaat?!
Yes. You read that right. Let me introduce you to the napuccino: “the coffee-then-nap combination [that] is the ideal technique for staving off sleepiness and increasing performance.” So, how does this work? “Since caffeine takes about twenty-five minutes to enter the bloodstream, [you get] a secondary boost… by the time [your] nap is ending [and you’re awaking].”
Pink offers five steps to take a perfect nap:
- Find your afternoon low time. “You’ll likely see a consistent block of time when things begin to go south, which for many people is about 7 hours after waking. This is your optimal nap time.”
- Create a peaceful environment. “Turn off your phone notifications. If you’ve got a door, close it. If you’ve got a couch, use it. To insulate yourself from sound and light, try earplugs or headphones and an eye mask.”
- Down a cup of coffee. “Seriously. The most efficient nap is the nappuccino. If you’re not a coffee drinker, search online for an alternative drink that provides about two hundred milligrams of caffeine. (If you avoid caffeine, skip this step.)”
- Set a timer on your phone for twenty-five minutes. “Since it takes most people about seven minutes to nod off, the twenty-five minute countdown clock is ideal. And, of course, when you wake up, the caffeine is beginning to kick in.”
- Repeat consistently. “There’s some evidence that habitual nappers get more from their naps than infrequent nappers. So if you have the flexibility to take a regular afternoon nap, consider making it a common ritual. If you don’t have the flexibility, then pick days when you’re really dipping—when you haven’t gotten enough sleep the day before of the stress and demands of the day are weightier than usual. You’ll feel a difference.
Happy napping!
ACTION
TODAY: Try taking one of these power naps and see how it goes. Pay close attention to how you feel. Please let me know!
FUTURE: Give regular napping a shot. The research on the benefits of napping is astonishing. Give yourself the opportunity to try out this hidden gem for better health and cognition. I know I will. If it doesn’t work out for you, you can always leave it aside and go back to zero napping, but you may find a wonderful way to become more alert, productive and healthy.
Know someone who could use a nap? Please share this post with them via email, Facebook or Twitter, thank you!
by Helena Escalante | Accountability, Goals, Growth, Habits, Leadership, Mindset, Time, Tools
Estimated reading time: 2 minutes, 50 seconds. 
TODAY’S IDEA: 2 types of No
— From The Coaching Habit: Say Less, Ask More & Change the Way You Lead Forever by Michael Bungay Stanier
Have you ever heard or spoken the phrase, “I never said I was going to do that!”?
In his wonderful book The Coaching Habit, Michael Bungay Stanier says that you need to be very clear on your commitments. Asking the question ‘‘‘What exactly [am I] saying Yes to?’ brings the commitment out of the shadows.” Further, asking “‘What could being fully committed to this idea look like?’ brings things into even sharper, bolder focus.”
“But a Yes is nothing without the No that gives it boundaries and form,” continues Stanier. And he points to two different kinds of No: the No of omission and the No of commission. The No of omission is the automatic result of you saying yes: all options happening at the same time are out of the question. “Understanding this kind of No helps you understand the implications of the decision.”
The No of commission “is what you now need to say to make the Yes happen. It’s all too easy to shove another Yes into the bag of our overcommitted lives, hoping that in a Harry Potter magical sort of way it will somehow all be accommodated. This second type of No puts the spotlight on how to create the space and focus, energy and resources that you’ll need to truly do that Yes.” And for this, Stanier suggests asking the following questions in three key “P” areas (Projects, People, Patterns):
Projects
- What projects do you need to abandon or postpone?
- What meetings will you no longer attend?
- What resources do you need to divert to the Yes?
People
- What expectations do you need to manage?
- What relationships will you let wither?
Patterns
- What habits do you need to break?
- What old stories or dated ambitions do you need to update?
- What beliefs about yourself do you need to let go of?
This is fascinating because it really puts commitment into perspective before we half-heartedly say yes to something again. The bottom-line question then becomes: “What will you say No to if you’re truly saying Yes to this?”
Remember that you can always request more information to fully understand the scope of the commitment you are getting into (go back to the 3Ps). And you always have the choice to decline if the commitment is too onerous with your time or if it will take away from other commitments that take priority.
ACTION
TODAY: Facing a choice on another commitment? Has your boss, colleague, friend, or someone else asked you to get involved in some project? Or are you considering taking up a particular project? (Classes, hobbies, remodeling your kitchen, etc.) Go over the questions above to determine what you will say No to so that you can truly say Yes to the new commitment.
FUTURE: Make a habit of going over the questions above every time you are questioning your involvement in a new commitment. They will bring much clarity as to whether you can/want to do the commitment, and they will save you from the heartache of going into something that you don’t fully understand what it will take. Coming back full circle, with these questions you will avoid ever saying again “I never said I was going to do that!”
Know someone struggling with the decision whether to embark on a new commitment? Please share this post with them via email, Facebook or Twitter, thank you!
