by Helena Escalante | Accountability, Creativity, Growth, Leadership, Mindset, Planning, Tools
Estimated reading time: 2 minutes, 55 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: On Batman and Perfectionism…
— From Barking Up the Wrong Tree: The Surprising Science Behind Why Everything You Know About Success Is (Mostly) Wrong by Eric Barker
Have you ever tried something once, failed, and given up? Or have you ever wanted to try something but got lost in the planning, analysis paralysis, or some other logistical problem that impeded you from even starting out? If so, you are not alone.
A lot of us have a perfectionist streak that wreaks havoc when it rears its ugly head. We want to be like superheroes: do everything right from the start and get the biggest, highest, and best result possible while we’re at it, the first time–of course–and then move on to the next success. But, how well has that perfectionism served us? (Ugh, don’t get me started…)
In his wonderful book, Barking Up the Wrong Tree, author Eric Barker takes a look at Batman from a perfectionism and success perspective. I liked this passage so much that I’m leaving it here intact for you:
“The Caped Crusader is among the most relatable of superheroes. He doesn’t possess any superpowers. Being a billionaire and having a collection of cool gadgets helps, but it doesn’t change the one overriding problem with staying Batman: he can never lose a fight. While a professional boxer with a record of thirty wins and one loss is very impressive, for the Dark Knight it means death. The villains of Gotham don’t let referees stop the bouts. So to be Batman means never losing. Ever. You cannot afford to fail. So if you did everything it takes to become the Dark Knight, how long could you maintain that perfect record? Luckily, we can draw on research, Yes, this has been studied. (God, I love science.)
Paul Zehr, a professor at the University of Victoria, looked at comparable athletes to get a rough idea. He studied the records of top boxers, MMA fighters, and NFL running backs. How long could they stay undefeated and without a crippling injury? How long could you stay Batman?
Three years. Yup, that’s it.
Let’s hope Gotham’s criminal element consists of more jaywalkers and fewer evil masterminds, because… you’re not going to have a lot of time to clean up the city.
Luckily, you’re not trying to be Batman. But too often you and I act like we are. We think we always have to be perfect. One failure and it’s all over. But you’re not Batman. You can fail and quit and learn. In fact, that’s the only way you can learn.”
How do you manage to keep your perfectionism in check? Let me know in the comments here.
ACTION
TODAY: Figure out where you are trying to become Batman. Ask yourself why 5 times. This will uncover the real reason behind you trying to act like a superhero on this project. Once the core issue is revealed, you can allow yourself to try to do it and not be devastated or quit altogether if you fail.
FUTURE: Give yourself permission to test or play with situations or projects to familiarize yourself with them. This way, will you be able to try, try, and try again, and accumulate knowledge about small and big failures, so that you can either continue down that path or find a better one. Don’t pin the failure on you, treat each project as an experiment and it will be easier to see yourself in “testing mode.”
Know someone who sometimes acts like Batman? Please share this post with them via email, Facebook, Twitter, or LinkedIn, thank you!
by Helena Escalante | Celebration, Collaboration, Creativity, Goals, Growth, Leadership, Mindset, Tools, Wellbeing
Estimated reading time: 3 minutes, 48 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: Leading is a Posture
— From Show Up Hard: A Road Map for Helpers in Crisis by Shannon Weber, MSW
I have enormous respect and admiration for Shannon Weber, author of the newly released book Show Up Hard. I am also immensely lucky to call her my friend.
She is one of 14 children and all her work and life can be described with one word: love. As an incredibly accomplished social worker (among other things and accolades, she used to run the crisis hotline in Houston, staffed by volunteers, and receiving 65,000 calls/year), she knows how important the role of love becomes in all our interactions, not just in times of crisis.
And in her book she also has a beautiful view on leading as a posture, which I’m excited to share with you today:
“Challenging times crave change,” says Shannon. Thus, she suggests we view ourselves as agents of change: “you are well equipped to reimagine yourself in a new role and create the lasting impact you seek to make. Switch from thinking about the job at hand to the role you can play. What if your job is not to be right or knowledgeable; what if your role is to create change?”
Then she goes on to say:
Leading is a posture of being in the world, a role we assume.
If you [i] have the potential to guide someone to a better place, or [ii] possess the ability to shine a light on a path ahead, or [iii] consider yourself a steward of the well-being of even one person—then you are a leader.
You are a steward of creating change. Leaders commit to the emotional labor of showing up to support change. Leaders commit to the long haul of seeing the process of change through.
Leading is both a privilege and a responsibility. Leading is also the responsibility of those with privilege.
A leader is not: a job title, a certain set of skills, a business card, an assignment, or an invitation from someone high up.
The posture of leadership can be adopted by anyone with the guts to believe that change is possible and with the courage to show up.
[…] We do our work of showing up for others within existing structures, institutions, and cultures. Even values-driven organizations can create unhealthy work environments…
Leading is often the work of the everyday and the mundane. Leaders are the people who give the very best part of themselves without expectation. Imagining oneself as a hero is easy: Fly in and save the day. Showing up when no one is watching, when the stakes are less high, when the task at hand is not as attractive—this is the work of creating change. Showing up is what it takes to lead, to be stewards.
Leaders choose to Show Up Hard. Leaders choose to go first.
And Shannon is a leader herself who has decide to change the world, starting right where she is, one love note at a time. She is the founder of LoveYou2.org where she has started a movement to spread love around the world. Here’s a mini-documentary about her project (2:43 min long) and her TEDx Talk where she talks about how it started and the enormous impact it has had. Also, Seth Godin, renowned author and marketing guru, mentioned another one of Shannon’s projects—giving capes to unsung heroes—in his blog asking, “What kind of impact does one act of kindness make? It can last for years.”
There will definitely be more posts about this book, so stay tuned! In the meantime, please let me know in the comments, how has your vision of leadership changed with this post? Do you see yourself as a leader now? You certainly are one! Are you ready to Show Up Hard? I’m cheering for you. 🙂 And in case you need some reminders, here are some beautiful ones that you can print from Shannon’s site.
“A leader is best when people barely know he exists, when his work is done, his aim fulfilled, they will say: we did it ourselves.” – Lao Tzu
ACTION
TODAY: Reimagine yourself in the role of an agent of change. What lasting impact are you seeking to make? Then commit to showing up hard.
FUTURE: Remind yourself that leading is a posture and that having a lasting impact is a daily job. You have to work consistently on the change you seek to make: you have to show up hard both when others are watching and when they are not—especially when no one is watching.
Know someone who would like this post? Please share this post with them via email, Facebook, Twitter, or LinkedIn, thank you!
by Helena Escalante | Accountability, Collaboration, Creativity, Goals, Growth, Leadership, Mindset, Planning, Productivity
Estimated reading time: 3 minutes, 33 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: 7 Principles of Leadership
— From No Excuses!: The Power of Self-Discipline: 21 Ways to Achieve Happiness and Success by Brian Tracy
Leadership and business guru, Brian Tracy, refers to 3,300 studies of leaders done by James MacPherson where the latter states that the first quality of leadership is vision.
“You become a leader when you accept responsibility for results,” says Tracy. “You become a leader when you begin to think, act and talk like a leader. You become a leader when you develop a vision for yourself and for your company, your life, or your area of responsibility […] and then share this vision with others and gain others’ commitment to make this vision a reality.”
And while there are hundreds of books written about leadership and vision, Tracy boils them down to one single word: success in the leader’s field. For instance, “a military leader has a vision of victory, from which he never deviates. A business leader has a vision of success for the business based on excellent performance, to which he or she is completely committed.”
But that’s not all. The author also points to the fact that in addition to a clear vision, “the leader must have a set of values and organizing principles that guide behavior and decision making.” Thus, he shares the following seven principles of leadership as a starting point:
1. Clarity: “This is perhaps your most important responsibility. You must be absolutely clear about who you are and what you stand for. You must be absolutely clear about your vision and where you want to lead your people.”
2. Competence: “You must set a standard of excellent performance for the organization [or project] as well as for every person and function [involved].”
3. Commitment: “The leader is absolutely committed to the success of the organization… This passionate commitment to the organization–—and to success and achievement—motivates and inspires people to do their best work and put their whole heart into [whatever they’re doing].
4. Constraints: “The job of the leader is to identify the constraints or limiting factors that set the speed at which the [organization achieves its goals]. The leader then allocates people and resources to alleviate those constraints and remove obstacles.”
And I would add to this one that leaders not just alleviate constraints, but help the team work creatively within the constraints to come out ahead. When how can we get rid of this constraint?, is no longer working or simply not feasible, the leader changes the mindset to how can we achieve our goal within or despite this constraint?
This reminds me of a quote by George Bernard Shaw that I love:
“The reasonable man adapts himself to the world, while the unreasonable man persists in adapting the world to himself….therefore all progress belongs to the unreasonable man”.
5. Creativity: “The leader is open to new ideas of all kinds and from all sources.”
6. Continuous learning: “The leader is personally committed to reading, listening, and upgrading his or hers personal knowledge and skills… and encourages everyone in the organization to learn and grow as a normal and natural part of business life.” Hint: I know of a blog that can help you with that… 😉
7. Consistency: “The leader has the self-discipline to be consistent, dependable, reliable, calm, and predictable in all situations. One of the great comforts of business life is… to know that the leader is completely consistent and reliable… calm, positive, and confident—especially under pressure.”
As you can see, these seven principles of leadership are rather simple, yet not easy. While they are obvious and should be a given in leaders, they aren’t always! Have you ever met someone who embodied these seven principles in their leadership? Let me know in the comments here, I’d love to know.
ACTION
TODAY: Create your list of values and principles, the ones that you hold dear, live for, and fully believe in. What are they? Pour your heart into it.
FUTURE: Share your list with the people that surround you so that they can be aware of your principles. Ask them to do the same. You’ll have the most wonderful conversations about this and will get to know each other so well!
Know someone who would like to read these seven values of leadership? Please share this post with them via email, Facebook, Twitter, or LinkedIn, thank you!
by Helena Escalante | Leadership, Mindset, Opportunity, Tools, Wellbeing
A reminder that EntreGurus is turning 1 tomorrow!! We’re having a virtual party and you’re all invited: click this link to join me on Saturday, January 19 from 1 – 3 PM Eastern Time (time converter). Stay the whole time or come and go as you wish, we’ll have fun chatting, I’ll answer any questions you have about EntreGurus or my experience blogging, and I’d love to see those of you that I know and get to know those of you who have recently joined the Gurupie community. Looking forward to tomorrow!!
Estimated reading time: 2 minutes, 47 seconds
TODAY’S IDEA: Let’s banish the word JUST 
— From This Is Day One: A Practical Guide to Leadership That Matters by Drew Dudley
I have come to love the ideas from This is Day ONE by Drew Dudley. They truly resonate with me and with my personal philosophy that we all have wonderful gifts—superpowers, if you may—that make us special and that make a difference in the lives of others.
And today’s idea is no exception. It’s about banishing the word JUST from our vocabulary when it’s used by us or others to diminish what we do. The author explains it beautifully, so I’ll leave a brief excerpt here for you:
…[W]hen we evaluate ourselves and what we do [we] add qualifiers and limiting words. “Just” is one of the most prevalent and restrictive of them.
Our lives and organizations are filled with “I’m just a…” people. “I’m just a receptionist”; “I’m just a salesperson”; “I’m just middle management”; “I’m just a stay at home mom”; “I’m just part-time”; “I’m just a student.” It’s likely that each one of us has said something similar about ourselves or, at the very least, about something we were attempting to do: “I’m just trying to get to the end of this project”; “We just have to figure out a way to deal with this.”
Every time we use the word “just” to describe who we are or what we’re doing, we’re telling people that we are unimportant. Every time we say we’re “just” something, we’re giving people permission to expect less from us.
Our lives and workplaces are filled with extraordinary people who regularly diminish themselves in this way and in the process, may convince themselves that it’s true. As such, I believe that one of the simplest but most powerful things we can do to enhance our leadership is to refuse to allow people who we know are people of value to diminish themselves in front of us.
[…] Our lives and workplaces are filled with too many people who think like that. Who have convinced themselves that they have no right to think of themselves as leaders because of what job they’ve ended up doing, or where in the corporate hierarchy they appear to have peaked.
[…] A commitment to banishing the word “just” from our vocabulary and our workplaces can have a profound impact.
Beautiful and true, isn’t it? Let’s ban the word just from our vocabulary when it’s used against elevating or enlightening purposes. We’ll all be better for it!
ACTION
TODAY: It’s so common to use the word “just” in our language—or to hear it from others—that we may have a hard time noticing. Be intentional about becoming aware to catch yourself or others using it.
FUTURE: Be on the lookout for the time(s) when you find yourself using “just” or when you hear others use it. Let others know how important their role or their work is, and how much you appreciate what they do! You’ll make their day. If it’s you who uses the word “just,” be gentle and remind yourself that what you do is important. Bring to mind a couple of examples when people have told you that your work matters. You’ll feel better and it will be easier to start banishing “just” from your vocabulary.
Know someone who would like to banish the word just from their vocabulary? Please share this post with them via email, Facebook, Twitter, or LinkedIn, thank you!
by Helena Escalante | Accountability, Celebration, Collaboration, Creativity, Leadership, Mindset, Opportunity, Planning, Tools
Estimated reading time: 3 minutes, 9 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: Go Behind the Scenes
— From REWORK: Change the way you work forever by Jason Fried and David Heinemeier Hansson
Imagine that someone wanted to do a reality show about your business. What would you show them? What would you like them to share on screen? Or if someone brought in a bunch of school kids into your business for a tour, what would you say and what aspects would you highlight for them?
Jason Fried and David Heinemeier Hansson, authors of the wonderful book Rework, suggest giving people a backstage pass to show them how your business works.
“Think no one will care? Think again. Even seemingly boring jobs can be fascinating when presented right. What could be more boring than commercial fishing and trucking? Yet the Discovery Channel and History Channel have turned these professions into highly rated shows: Deadliest Catch and Ice Road Truckers.
It doesn’t have to be a dangerous job either. People love finding out the little secrets of all kinds of businesses, even one that makes those tiny marshmallows in breakfast cereals. That’s why the Food Network’s Unwrapped—which explores the secrets behind lunch box treats, soda pop, movie candy, and more—is such a popular program.”
People are naturally curious about how things are made. I know I’ve always enjoyed getting the opportunity to talk to people about their work, and when possible, I’ve taken the opportunity to take a tour of their workplaces, factories, offices, and more!
The beauty of letting people take a peek behind the scenes of your business is that “it changes your relationship with them,” the authors say. “They’ll feel a bond with you and see you as human beings instead of a faceless company. They’ll see the sweat and effort that goes into what you sell. They’ll develop a deeper level of understanding and appreciation for what you do.”
So, if at all possible, let people come into your backstage and let them see what you do. You’d be surprised about how much fun they have and how you’ll see your business in a whole new light after that!
And on that topic, I’m holding an online party in the form of an Ask-Me-Anything session as a way to—virtually—open up EntreGurus to all the readers in celebration of its one-year anniversary. Woohoo!! Yes, it’s incredible how fast this first year has gone by, and I’m so grateful for you joining me on this journey and allowing me to share 365 ideas with you. 🙂
Please save the date for the virtual party: Saturday, January 19, 2019, from 1-3 pm (U.S. Eastern Time – here’s a handy time converter). I’ll be delighted to see those of you that I know and also to meet those of you that I don’t know yet, I’m always excited to make new friends! Stay for the whole time or come and go as you please within that time frame, here’s the link to join the party. Simply click on it and let the Internet work its magic to connect us.
And, if you can’t join us, but would like to send a Happy Anniversary message, here’s a corkboard where you can leave a sticky note. Would love to hear from you!
ACTION
TODAY: What creative way can you find to open up your business to your clients? From writing a blog post or creating a slide show or a video, to having an open house, your imagination is the limit. How can you engage your readers?
FUTURE: Set up times throughout the year when people can go behind the scenes for virtual or real tours. Your clients and other curious folks will be grateful for sharing with them your knowledge and expertise. In turn, you will forge a stronger bond with them that will result in loyalty and recommendations.
Know someone who would like this post? Please share it via email, Facebook, Twitter, or LinkedIn, thank you!
by Helena Escalante | Accountability, Goals, Growth, Habits, Leadership, Mindset, Planning, Tools
Estimated reading time: 3 minutes, 7 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: Yes and No Are Choices We Make
— From: Habit Changers: 81 Game-Changing Mantras to Mindfully Realize Your Goals by M. J. Ryan
In yesterday’s post, we learned that our reaction to what happens is our choice. This prompted me to go back to M.J. Ryan’s book, Habit Changers, where she taught a client of hers that yes and no are choices we make.
Ryan’s client was an executive director of a nonprofit. As part of the coaching process, the homework for the client was to apply what she learned in the session to her life. What Ryan noticed was that the client would agree to do it but she’d skip it, and the next time they’d meet, the client had not done it. This went on for several sessions.
Ryan pointed this out to the client, and the client instantly had an epiphany: “That’s why people are so upset with me as a leader! I do that with everyone—I say yes to whatever they ask because I want to please them, and then I don’t follow through because I’ve got too much to do!”
The author says that not being able to say no, “stems from a desire to make others happy and avoid conflict.” The unfortunate part is that “it ends up creating more conflict and disappointment than if you had said no in the first place.” And Ryan proposes this apt mantra: “You can’t say yes if you can’t say no.”
She goes on to say that, “when you say yes to something you can’t follow through on, you’re not actually being helpful—you’re just appeasing those around you and ultimately causing bad feelings.”
By remembering that yes and no are choices we make and repeating that mantra, Ryan’s client “discovered that the more she could say no when she felt it, the more her yes was wholehearted.” The client’s story, fortunately, has a happy ending: “her follow-through improved dramatically and so did her team’s respect for her word.”
No matter how much we want to please or appease, saying yes when we don’t know if we’ll be certain to make it happen is not the best strategy. It puts our word and reputation on the line. Learning to say no is one of the best skills we can learn.
Have you ever found yourself saying yes out of a sense of not wanting to hurt anybody’s feelings or to appease someone? I know I have because I’m a pleaser. While I’m definitely not proud of those moments, they serve me as reminders of how I need to see the person and the favor asked of me as two different things. My relationship with the person who is asking is one thing and that, fortunately, doesn’t change (family, friend, client, etc). The favor that he/she is asking me to do is a completely different thing, and this frees me up to say yes or no based on my workload. Giving an answer to the task someone asks me to do is easier if I separate it this way in my mind.
How have you been able to learn to say no? Let me know in the comments here!
ACTION
TODAY: Remember that yes and no are choices we make, from tiny ones to major decisions. What choices will you make today?
FUTURE: Keep reminding yourself that yes and no are separate from the relationship that you have with the person who asks you to do something. While being on the receiving end of no may not be what the person who asked was expecting, if you explain that you won’t be able to fulfill what is asked of you and you don’t want to disappoint, your answer will be appreciated and respected.
Know someone who would like to read this post? Please share it with them via email, Facebook, Twitter, or LinkedIn, thank you!
