You’ve met Derek Sivers before (here, here, here and here), as I love his brief but oh-so-insightful book Anything You Want. What you may not know about him is that he was a musician, and his story of becoming an entrepreneur (founding, growing and selling CD Baby) stemmed from his desire to sell his music online.
As a musician, Sivers recalls the story of the many exercises one of his voice teachers had him do:
“For each lesson, I’d bring in one song I was trying to improve. First, I’d sing it for him as written. Then he’d say, ‘OK, now do it up and octave.’ ‘Uh… up an octave? But I can’t sing that high!’ ‘I don’t care! Do it anyway! Go! One, two, three, four.’ I’d sing the whole song again, in screeching, squeaking falsetto, sounding like an undead cartoon mouse. But by the second half of the song, it was almost charming. Then he’d say, ‘OK, now do it down an octave.’ ‘Down an octave? But I don’t think I can!’ ‘Doesn’t matter! Go! One, two, three, four.’ I sounded like a garbage disposal or lawn mower, but he made me sing the whole song that way. Then he’d made me sing it twice as fast. Then twice as slow. Then like Bob Dylan. Then like Tom Waits. Then he’d tell me to sing it like it’s 4 a.m. and a friend woke me up. And then he’d give me many other scenarios. After all of this, he’d say, ‘Now, how did that song go again?’ It was the clearest proof that what I thought was ‘the’ way the song went was really just one of an infinite number of options.”
When we are stuck, or when we think there’s only one way, it’s helpful to keep this exercise in mind as it will help offer many options. Sivers goes on to illustrate how he was taking an entrepreneurship class and the group was analyzing a business plan—that proposed just one idea. He felt like saying things his teacher would have said:
“OK, make a plan that requires only $1,000. Go!”
“Now make a plan for ten times as many customers. Go!”
“Now do it without a website. Go!”
“Now make all your initial assumptions wrong, and have it work anyway. Go!”
“Now show how you would franchise it. Go!”
Sivers says, “You can’t pretend there’s only one way to do it. Your first idea is just one of many options. No business goes as planned, so make ten radically different plans.”
ACTION
TODAY: Is there a place in your professional or personal life where you are feeling stuck? Are you clinging to just that one option because you think it’s the best possible, or you’re afraid of exploring what’s out there, or you think it’s your last chance or (insert your thoughts here)? Take a moment to go through this exercise creating options for yourself. Some options will be funny, others crazy, a few may be awful… but you will certainly experience a shift inside that will make you truly realize there are other options. And while you’re at it, you may discover some options that are just great for you. OK, Go! One, two, three, four!
FUTURE: As you consider projects or plans for the future, keep this great exercise in mind. It will open up your eyes to the myriad possibilities that are out there, and provide you with flexibility to make your plans happen. There are many routes to get to your goals, so don’t be afraid to take the road less traveled or take a detour now and then. I especially like this option and suggest you keep it in mind: “Now make all your initial assumptions wrong, and have it work anyway. Go!”
Know someone who would benefit from expanding his or her options? Please share this post with that person via email, Facebook or Twitter, thank you! OK, Go!
We’ve all heard the adage it’s better to give than to receive. We bought into it and became givers—which is wonderful—but we also became very bad receivers. T. Harv Eker, personal development guru and author of Secrets of the Millionaire Mind says, “The whole idea is ludicrous. What’s better, hot or cold, big or small, left or right, in or out? Giving and receiving are two sides of the same coin. Whoever decided that it is better to give than to receive was simply bad at math. For every giver there must be a receiver, and for every receiver there must be a giver. […] Both have to be in perfect balance to work one to one, fifty-fifty. And since giving and receiving must always equal each other, they must also be equal in importance.”
Giving gives us a feeling of fulfillment like no other. We’re joyful and grateful to be able to give. But what about when we are trying to give and the other person refuses to receive? It feels terrible, doesn’t it? Now, think about those times when we are the ones that are not willing to receive.
How many times have we refused to receive something that someone wants to give us? Or taken a step further, how many times have we refused to receive something that we want to give ourselves? How many times have we said no to an opportunity and refused it because we feel we’re undeserving, not worthy, or because we have impostor syndrome? This may very well be at the subconscious level, but if you’ve ever done something to sabotage your success in big or small ways (I’m not proud to say that I’m a repeat offender in this department…) you know what I’m talking about.
Think about it for a moment. There’s a part of you that feels worthy of some things (eating, working, driving); and there’s another that doesn’t (when someone wants to give you a gift or an opportunity that is bigger than what you consider acceptable). You are living with this duality that you made up in your mind.
Eker says, “Recognize that whether you are worthy or not it’s all a made-up ‘story.’ Nothing has meaning except for the meaning we give it. […] If you say you’re worthy, you are. If you say you’re not worthy, you’re not. Either way you will live into your story. […] Only the most evolved creature on the planet, the human being, has the ability to limit itself like this. One of my own sayings is, ‘If a hundred-foot oak tree had the mind of the human, it would only grow to be ten feet tall!’ So here’s my suggestion: since it’s a lot easier to change your story than your worthiness, instead of worrying about changing your worthiness change your story. It’s a lot faster and cheaper. Simply make up a new and much more supportive story and live into that.”
How about if the new story you adopt is that of being happy and grateful to receive; willing to enjoy and make the most out of the gift; and share the joy of receiving so that others can learn to be better receivers too?
ACTION
TODAY: Give yourself a gift that in the past you wouldn’t even have considered. You can buy something if you want, but if you don’t, it doesn’t have to be a physical thing. It could be taking time from your busy schedule to walk in nature, or taking a long, contemplative bath, or giving yourself a free evening and not cleaning the kitchen tonight (hahahaha) and using that time to read your favorite book instead. You can take it up a notch and give yourself the opportunity to get to know someone: go to lunch with a colleague and don’t talk about work. Send an email to a person you admire. You’re only limited by your imagination, so make it a lovely-and-unheard-of gift from you to you. Enjoy it, no guilt, no afterthought, no remorse, just plain acceptance and gratitude. Try it!
FUTURE: Keep in mind that giving and receiving is 50-50. So, when someone wants to give you something (from a compliment to a large gift), be open to receive it and be grateful. Gifts aren’t earned otherwise they’d be called compensation. They come from the heart, and the giver always thinks that you are worthy of the gift, so it’s just you the one who needs to change your story to be a better a receiver. Change it and enjoy receiving!
Know someone who needs to learn to receive? Please share this post with that person via email, Facebook or Twitter!
Are you lucky? According to Darren Hardy, author of The Compound Effect, “everyone has the opportunity to be ‘lucky,’ because beyond having the basics of health and sustenance, luck simply comes down to a series of choices.” He continues, “The difference between becoming fabulously rich, happy and healthy, or broke, depressed and unhealthy, is the choices you make throughout life. Nothing else will make a difference.”
Hardy was the publisher of SUCCESS magazine for many years, and he recalls a time when he asked Richard Branson, the founder of Virgin Group, if he thought luck had been a part of his success. Branson answered, “Yes, of course, we are all lucky. If you live in a free society, you are lucky. Luck surrounds us every day; we are constantly having lucky things happen to us, whether you recognize it or not. I have not been any more lucky or unlucky that anyone else. The difference is when luck came my way, I took advantage of it.”
We’ve all heard the maxim that says: luck is when preparation meets opportunity. Hardy agrees, yet he believes preparation and opportunity are not enough, thus he adds two more components to the luck formula:
Preparation (personal growth): “By consistently improving and preparing yourself—your skills, knowledge, expertise, relationships, and resources— you have the wherewithal to take advantage of great opportunities when they arise (when luck ‘strikes’).” Movie producer Samuel Goldwyn said, “The harder I work the luckier I get.”
Attitude (belief/mindset): “It’s simply a matter of seeing situations, conversations, and circumstances as fortuitous. You cannot see what you don’t look for, and you cannot look for what you don’t believe in.” Bernadette Jiwa, business and brand strategist, writes in her book Hunch, “every day is filled with opportunities, either seized or missed, ours for the taking if only we can learn to listen for them.” (Read post).
Opportunity (a good thing coming your way):
“Luck isn’t forced. It’s a natural occurrence, and it often shows up seemingly of its own accord.” And, even though opportunity is a good thing coming your way, sometimes it comes in disguise and shows up, as Albert Einstein said, in the middle of difficulty.
Action (doing something about it): “This is where you come in. However this luck was delivered to you… it’s now your job to act on it. […] So no more whining about the cards you were dealt, the great defeats you suffered, or any other circumstances. Countless people have more disadvantages and greater obstacles than you, and yet they’re wealthier and more fulfilled. Luck is an equal-opportunity distributor. Lady luck shines on all, but rather than having your umbrella overhead, you’ve got to have your face to the sky. When it comes down to it, it’s all you. There’s no other way around it.”
“You seldom, if ever, get lucky sitting down.” Zig Ziglar
ACTION
TODAY: Take a moment today to think of all the opportunities that you have in front of you: the wild ones, the sensible ones, the big ones, the small ones. The idea is not to spread yourself too thin and act on them all, but to start seeing opportunity all around you. You’ll soon realize how lucky you are and how you can increase your luck by acting on an opportunity should you decide to do so. Is there one that fits right in with your goals? Go for it! If not, no worries, keep this quote from Richard Branson in mind, “Opportunities are like buses – there’s always another one coming!”
FUTURE: Make a point of constantly learning and growing yourself (I know a blog called EntreGurus that can help you… 😉 ), seeing opportunity wherever you go, and being ready to act when luck presents itself. Make sure that the opportunities you act on are taking you further in the direction of your goals. Remember, if it’s not an absolutely ‘Hell, yeah!’ then say no. That’s how you maximize your luck.
Best of luck! 🍀
Please share this post with a lucky friend or colleague via email, Facebook or Twitter!
TODAY’S IDEA: 9 Lessons I learned from my mom about leadership and business
Happy Mother’s Day!
From a very young age, mothers teach us many of the most important lessons that we will need in life, and also in business. As we grow up, our mothers are our leaders, and we look up to them to learn and emulate. It’s only fitting that today we thank them for everything they’ve taught us and everything they’ve done for us. As a tribute to my mom, whom I love and adore, here are 9 of the myriad lessons she’s taught me and how I use them today for leadership and business.
1. “Always take a sweater,” and “always pack a bathing suit.”
No matter how well informed you are up front, always plan for the unforeseen, best- and worst-case scenarios.
2. “Always say please and thank you.”
Common courtesy goes a very long way anywhere you go.
3. “Don’t do good things that can be perceived as being bad.”
As a leader, the only things you have are your name and your reputation. Protect them. Don’t hang out with the wrong crowd, even if you’re just trying to be nice. When they do crazy stuff, it won’t matter if you didn’t do anything, you’ll be guilty by association.
4. “Take care of yourself, you only have one body.”
YOU are the most important thing you have. Take proper care of yourself: your health and your wellbeing are first and foremost, always.
5. “If your trip is going to be a whirlwind and you don’t know what the schedule will be like, go to the bathroom when you can, and eat when you can—even if it’s not the time for it. And don’t forget to take with you water and snacks.” In the face of uncertainty, make sure you are well, and your basic needs are taken care of. Then you can tackle everything else.
6. “Think twice before giving away your toys.”
Once you give something away (from a beloved toy to equity in your company) it’s going to be very hard to get it back, if ever. Think twice before you give anything away that is precious to you, but when you do, do it gladly and fully convinced that you made the best decision.
7. “If a decision backfires, don’t blame yourself. Know that you made it with all the information you had at the moment and with the best intention in mind.”
Take your time before you make an important decision to deeply ponder all aspects of it. Ask for expert points of view, and use whatever is helpful from those opinions in forming yours. Make sure the decision is ultimately yours, and make it fully convinced that the course of action you choose is the best one for your circumstances. This is the best way to be OK with yourself and to solve things if something goes wrong or backfires. Only when you are OK with yourself can you move forward with a clear conscience and a focused mind.
8. “You can always change your mind.”
You are not bound to anything and you can always change your mind to make your circumstances better. Part of that change may involve anything from small tweaks (returning an item to the store), to big, bold and sometimes uncomfortable challenges (such as changing jobs, lifestyles, partners, getting out of a contract, etc.). Don’t ever feel stuck: there are always options for the better if you just give yourself the opportunity to search and ask for them.
9. “I’ll always be here for you.”
It’s so important to have someone in your life that you can always rely on and who is 100% dependable and trustworthy. Be that person for your loved ones. Be that person for your friends. Be that person for your team. Be that person for your clients. You will find that, in return, they’ll do the same for you and strong bonds will emerge. Cherish and celebrate those bonds.
ACTION
TODAY & FUTURE: Celebrate your mom, yourself if you are a mother, and other mothers around you—it’s the world’s toughest job! Check out this great (and funny) video below, and please share it via email, Facebook or Twitter, thanks!
In his very charming style, Pink regaled us with the many stories, insights and research findings included in his book. Needless to say I got a copy, which I immediately started reading!
One of the things that he said during his talk is that we need to take more breaks. It specifically struck me the way he stated it: “professionals take breaks, amateurs don’t.” What he meant was that all of us who think that taking a break during the day is going to slow us down (I’m the first one here and so guilty of this—you can find me many times eating lunch at my desk to try to respond to a few more emails …) are not accomplishing as much as the professionals who have tested and proven to themselves that breaks are restorative to our mood and performance, replenish our energy and make us more productive.
But what kind of break should we take? In his book, Pink offers five kinds of restorative breaks:
Micro-breaks. “A replenishing break need not be lengthy. Even breaks that last a minute or less—what researchers call micro-breaks—can pay dividends.” You might want to consider giving your eyes a break from the computer screen every 20 min and focusing on something 20 feet away for 20 seconds (this is called the 20-20-20 rule). Or consider getting a very small water battle so that when it runs out frequently you can get up to refill it and that way you move, hydrate and take a micro-break. Or you can stand up and shake arms and legs, rotate your core and then sit down again.
Moving breaks. Since our lifestyle/work is quite sedentary, “build more movement into your breaks.” You can take a 5-min walk every hour, do office yoga poses at your desk, or sneak in a few push-ups.
Nature breaks. “Study after study has shown the replenishing effects of nature. What’s more, people consistently underestimate how much better nature makes them feel.” Walk in nature (say, a park) if you can, or simply go outside (if your place of work has a little green space with trees or lawn and a bench, “sit there instead of inside.” Remember the quote by Ramon Inmon: if you are seeking creative ideas, go out walking. Angels whisper to a man when he goes for a walk.”
Social breaks. “Don’t go it alone. At least not always. Social breaks are effective, especially when you decide the who and how.” Pink suggests calling someone and catching up for five or ten minutes, plan to walk regularly with some colleagues that you like, or don’t schedule it at all if your calendar won’t allow for it. “Buy someone a coffee one day this week. Bring it to her. Sit and talk about something other than work for five minutes.”
Mental gear-shifting breaks. “Our brains suffer fatigue just as much as our bodies do.” Pink recommends giving our brain a break by trying meditation (doesn’t have to be long, 3 minutes will do), controlled breathing (45 seconds) or lighten up by watching a funny video or listening to a funny podcast, etc.
ACTION
TODAY: Stop reading this now and go take a restorative break! 🙂
FUTURE: Build breaks into your schedule. As you saw, they don’t have to be lengthy, they just need to be powerful enough to take your mind off from what you are doing. Breaks also provide the bridge between a finished task and the beginning of the next. Build the habit of incorporating breaks into your schedule and soon you’ll be working like a pro!
Know someone who needs to take a break?Please share this post with them via email, Facebook or Twitter, thank you!
Leaders are a little more progressive.
A little more innovative.
A little more creative.
They take that extra step.
Spend a little more effort.
Get a little more accomplished.
Get a few more results.
They get promoted a little sooner.
However, they can’t run too far ahead of the pack.
They need support from others to be successful. If they’re too far ahead, others can’t keep up. If others can’t keep up, they can’t help their leaders if they encounter trouble.
So, unless you want to go it completely alone, keep ahead, but not too far ahead.
Perhaps we need to reconsider the phrase and, instead, run with the pack. I’ll leave you with this African proverb as food for thought: “If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together.”
ACTION
TODAY: Think of the many instances in your life where you lead, both professionally and personally. Where are you going way too fast? Where do you need to slow down and catch up with those that you are leading? Conversely, where are you going too slow? What are the changes that you need to make?
FUTURE: As you embark on new leadership projects, think of your followers and the community that you want to build around each project. What are the expectations among the people you will lead? How about you: what are your expectations? Are both sets of expectations compatible? What are the constraints? What are the opportunities? Where do you want to take the project and in what timeframe? Make sure you are all on the same page so that you can be successful together. Remember that you, as a leader make all the difference!
Know someone who is running too far ahead of the pack? Please share this post with them via email, Facebook or Twitter, thank you!
TODAY’S IDEA: One of many options
TODAY’S IDEA: 9 Lessons I learned from my mom about leadership and business
