by Helena Escalante | Celebration, Collaboration, Creativity, Goals, Growth, Leadership, Mindset, Tools, Wellbeing
Estimated reading time: 3 minutes, 48 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: Leading is a Posture
— From Show Up Hard: A Road Map for Helpers in Crisis by Shannon Weber, MSW
I have enormous respect and admiration for Shannon Weber, author of the newly released book Show Up Hard. I am also immensely lucky to call her my friend.
She is one of 14 children and all her work and life can be described with one word: love. As an incredibly accomplished social worker (among other things and accolades, she used to run the crisis hotline in Houston, staffed by volunteers, and receiving 65,000 calls/year), she knows how important the role of love becomes in all our interactions, not just in times of crisis.
And in her book she also has a beautiful view on leading as a posture, which I’m excited to share with you today:
“Challenging times crave change,” says Shannon. Thus, she suggests we view ourselves as agents of change: “you are well equipped to reimagine yourself in a new role and create the lasting impact you seek to make. Switch from thinking about the job at hand to the role you can play. What if your job is not to be right or knowledgeable; what if your role is to create change?”
Then she goes on to say:
Leading is a posture of being in the world, a role we assume.
If you [i] have the potential to guide someone to a better place, or [ii] possess the ability to shine a light on a path ahead, or [iii] consider yourself a steward of the well-being of even one person—then you are a leader.
You are a steward of creating change. Leaders commit to the emotional labor of showing up to support change. Leaders commit to the long haul of seeing the process of change through.
Leading is both a privilege and a responsibility. Leading is also the responsibility of those with privilege.
A leader is not: a job title, a certain set of skills, a business card, an assignment, or an invitation from someone high up.
The posture of leadership can be adopted by anyone with the guts to believe that change is possible and with the courage to show up.
[…] We do our work of showing up for others within existing structures, institutions, and cultures. Even values-driven organizations can create unhealthy work environments…
Leading is often the work of the everyday and the mundane. Leaders are the people who give the very best part of themselves without expectation. Imagining oneself as a hero is easy: Fly in and save the day. Showing up when no one is watching, when the stakes are less high, when the task at hand is not as attractive—this is the work of creating change. Showing up is what it takes to lead, to be stewards.
Leaders choose to Show Up Hard. Leaders choose to go first.
And Shannon is a leader herself who has decide to change the world, starting right where she is, one love note at a time. She is the founder of LoveYou2.org where she has started a movement to spread love around the world. Here’s a mini-documentary about her project (2:43 min long) and her TEDx Talk where she talks about how it started and the enormous impact it has had. Also, Seth Godin, renowned author and marketing guru, mentioned another one of Shannon’s projects—giving capes to unsung heroes—in his blog asking, “What kind of impact does one act of kindness make? It can last for years.”
There will definitely be more posts about this book, so stay tuned! In the meantime, please let me know in the comments, how has your vision of leadership changed with this post? Do you see yourself as a leader now? You certainly are one! Are you ready to Show Up Hard? I’m cheering for you. 🙂 And in case you need some reminders, here are some beautiful ones that you can print from Shannon’s site.
“A leader is best when people barely know he exists, when his work is done, his aim fulfilled, they will say: we did it ourselves.” – Lao Tzu
ACTION
TODAY: Reimagine yourself in the role of an agent of change. What lasting impact are you seeking to make? Then commit to showing up hard.
FUTURE: Remind yourself that leading is a posture and that having a lasting impact is a daily job. You have to work consistently on the change you seek to make: you have to show up hard both when others are watching and when they are not—especially when no one is watching.
Know someone who would like this post? Please share this post with them via email, Facebook, Twitter, or LinkedIn, thank you!
by Helena Escalante | Leadership, Mindset, Opportunity, Tools, Wellbeing
A reminder that EntreGurus is turning 1 tomorrow!! We’re having a virtual party and you’re all invited: click this link to join me on Saturday, January 19 from 1 – 3 PM Eastern Time (time converter). Stay the whole time or come and go as you wish, we’ll have fun chatting, I’ll answer any questions you have about EntreGurus or my experience blogging, and I’d love to see those of you that I know and get to know those of you who have recently joined the Gurupie community. Looking forward to tomorrow!!
Estimated reading time: 2 minutes, 47 seconds
TODAY’S IDEA: Let’s banish the word JUST 
— From This Is Day One: A Practical Guide to Leadership That Matters by Drew Dudley
I have come to love the ideas from This is Day ONE by Drew Dudley. They truly resonate with me and with my personal philosophy that we all have wonderful gifts—superpowers, if you may—that make us special and that make a difference in the lives of others.
And today’s idea is no exception. It’s about banishing the word JUST from our vocabulary when it’s used by us or others to diminish what we do. The author explains it beautifully, so I’ll leave a brief excerpt here for you:
…[W]hen we evaluate ourselves and what we do [we] add qualifiers and limiting words. “Just” is one of the most prevalent and restrictive of them.
Our lives and organizations are filled with “I’m just a…” people. “I’m just a receptionist”; “I’m just a salesperson”; “I’m just middle management”; “I’m just a stay at home mom”; “I’m just part-time”; “I’m just a student.” It’s likely that each one of us has said something similar about ourselves or, at the very least, about something we were attempting to do: “I’m just trying to get to the end of this project”; “We just have to figure out a way to deal with this.”
Every time we use the word “just” to describe who we are or what we’re doing, we’re telling people that we are unimportant. Every time we say we’re “just” something, we’re giving people permission to expect less from us.
Our lives and workplaces are filled with extraordinary people who regularly diminish themselves in this way and in the process, may convince themselves that it’s true. As such, I believe that one of the simplest but most powerful things we can do to enhance our leadership is to refuse to allow people who we know are people of value to diminish themselves in front of us.
[…] Our lives and workplaces are filled with too many people who think like that. Who have convinced themselves that they have no right to think of themselves as leaders because of what job they’ve ended up doing, or where in the corporate hierarchy they appear to have peaked.
[…] A commitment to banishing the word “just” from our vocabulary and our workplaces can have a profound impact.
Beautiful and true, isn’t it? Let’s ban the word just from our vocabulary when it’s used against elevating or enlightening purposes. We’ll all be better for it!
ACTION
TODAY: It’s so common to use the word “just” in our language—or to hear it from others—that we may have a hard time noticing. Be intentional about becoming aware to catch yourself or others using it.
FUTURE: Be on the lookout for the time(s) when you find yourself using “just” or when you hear others use it. Let others know how important their role or their work is, and how much you appreciate what they do! You’ll make their day. If it’s you who uses the word “just,” be gentle and remind yourself that what you do is important. Bring to mind a couple of examples when people have told you that your work matters. You’ll feel better and it will be easier to start banishing “just” from your vocabulary.
Know someone who would like to banish the word just from their vocabulary? Please share this post with them via email, Facebook, Twitter, or LinkedIn, thank you!
by Helena Escalante | Accountability, Goals, Growth, Habits, Mindset, Planning, Productivity, Resolutions, Time, Tools
Estimated reading time: 2 minutes, 55 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: Today is National Ditch Your Resolutions Day
— From The Perfect Day Formula: How to Own the Day And Control Your Life by Craig Ballantyne
Whaaaaaaaaaaaat???????!!!!!!
Not happy with Quitters’ Day someone decided to have a National Ditch Your Resolutions Day… Really?????!!!!!
Yep. And that day is today, January 17, “popularly thought to be the day when a large number of people abandon their New Year’s resolutions.” (Source.)
According to the stats cited in this Inc. Magazine article, 91% of people fail to keep their resolutions. However, that is not appalling, given that resolutions—in my opinion—are just like wishes: very nice to have but not necessary.
If you want to be successful, the resolutions and wishes have to be substituted by goals and habits.
And a great author and role model for this is Craig Ballantyne. In his book The Perfect Day Formula, he sets out a 7-step plan to create Habits of Steel:
1. Figure out what matters… and focus on it. “Success requires us to do the first things first. Choose your time wisely. Figure out what really matters to you and then use the rest of the steps to build habits that allow you to focus your time on it.”
2. Identify steps to success and rules for your life. “No one will ever be perfect at keeping to their rules, but you will be better for trying, and you will have stronger habits that allow you to avoid the disappointment, guilt, and regret of wasted days.”
3. Create a checklist for new habits. “Connecting a positive action… with a daily trigger… is a great way to create new habits. Each habit needs to be broken down into action items for you to get started.”
4. Prepare the night before. “Winning habits begin with proper planning. Prepare your checklist. Lay out an easy-to-follow pathway for success. Set out any tools you will need to do for the first things first.”
5. Remove all obstacles. “ Removing obstacles, temptations, and bad habits is one of the most important changes you can make in life. Eliminating the negatives is often more important for success than relying on willpower for the creation of new habits.”
6. Take massive action. “We can control what time we wake up, what habits we start the day with, what temptations enter—and are eliminated—from our lives, and what systems we have in place for dealing with all of these. We can believe in ourselves or we can have doubt. It’s our choice.”
7. Learn and improve. “Few days will be easy. Most days will require you to fight tooth-and-nail to stick to your habits and achieve your goals. On those days, take the opportunity to learn from your mistakes and struggles. They will make you stronger.”
Oh, and one last thing: Ballantyne says that a little incentive never hurts. “Give yourself a prize for taking action and following through. We repeat what we reward. It can be as simple as enjoying the beauty of a sunrise as you meditate.”
So, are you ready to celebrate National Ditch Your Resolutions Day by ditching your resolutions and turning them into habits? Imagine what your life will be like a year from now if you turned your resolutions or wishes into ingrained habits.
I’m cheering for you!
ACTION
TODAY: What resolutions would you like to turn into habits? Be very specific and then apply Ballantyne’s seven-step plan. For more on how to succeed at this, here’s a post I wrote last year: New Year’s Resolutions vs. SMART Goals.
FUTURE: Next year, don’t set resolutions. Instead, set goals that you can turn into habits.
Know someone who would like to ditch their resolutions for goals and habits instead? Please share this post with them via email, Facebook, Twitter, or LinkedIn, thank you!
by Helena Escalante | Accountability, Celebration, Collaboration, Creativity, Leadership, Mindset, Opportunity, Planning, Tools
Estimated reading time: 3 minutes, 9 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: Go Behind the Scenes
— From REWORK: Change the way you work forever by Jason Fried and David Heinemeier Hansson
Imagine that someone wanted to do a reality show about your business. What would you show them? What would you like them to share on screen? Or if someone brought in a bunch of school kids into your business for a tour, what would you say and what aspects would you highlight for them?
Jason Fried and David Heinemeier Hansson, authors of the wonderful book Rework, suggest giving people a backstage pass to show them how your business works.
“Think no one will care? Think again. Even seemingly boring jobs can be fascinating when presented right. What could be more boring than commercial fishing and trucking? Yet the Discovery Channel and History Channel have turned these professions into highly rated shows: Deadliest Catch and Ice Road Truckers.
It doesn’t have to be a dangerous job either. People love finding out the little secrets of all kinds of businesses, even one that makes those tiny marshmallows in breakfast cereals. That’s why the Food Network’s Unwrapped—which explores the secrets behind lunch box treats, soda pop, movie candy, and more—is such a popular program.”
People are naturally curious about how things are made. I know I’ve always enjoyed getting the opportunity to talk to people about their work, and when possible, I’ve taken the opportunity to take a tour of their workplaces, factories, offices, and more!
The beauty of letting people take a peek behind the scenes of your business is that “it changes your relationship with them,” the authors say. “They’ll feel a bond with you and see you as human beings instead of a faceless company. They’ll see the sweat and effort that goes into what you sell. They’ll develop a deeper level of understanding and appreciation for what you do.”
So, if at all possible, let people come into your backstage and let them see what you do. You’d be surprised about how much fun they have and how you’ll see your business in a whole new light after that!
And on that topic, I’m holding an online party in the form of an Ask-Me-Anything session as a way to—virtually—open up EntreGurus to all the readers in celebration of its one-year anniversary. Woohoo!! Yes, it’s incredible how fast this first year has gone by, and I’m so grateful for you joining me on this journey and allowing me to share 365 ideas with you. 🙂
Please save the date for the virtual party: Saturday, January 19, 2019, from 1-3 pm (U.S. Eastern Time – here’s a handy time converter). I’ll be delighted to see those of you that I know and also to meet those of you that I don’t know yet, I’m always excited to make new friends! Stay for the whole time or come and go as you please within that time frame, here’s the link to join the party. Simply click on it and let the Internet work its magic to connect us.
And, if you can’t join us, but would like to send a Happy Anniversary message, here’s a corkboard where you can leave a sticky note. Would love to hear from you!
ACTION
TODAY: What creative way can you find to open up your business to your clients? From writing a blog post or creating a slide show or a video, to having an open house, your imagination is the limit. How can you engage your readers?
FUTURE: Set up times throughout the year when people can go behind the scenes for virtual or real tours. Your clients and other curious folks will be grateful for sharing with them your knowledge and expertise. In turn, you will forge a stronger bond with them that will result in loyalty and recommendations.
Know someone who would like this post? Please share it via email, Facebook, Twitter, or LinkedIn, thank you!
by Helena Escalante | Accountability, Creativity, Habits, Mindset, Planning, Productivity, Tools
Estimated reading time: 2 minutes, 34 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: Triggers Can Help Stop Procrastination
— From The Perfect Day Formula: How to Own the Day And Control Your Life by Craig Ballantyne
Craig Ballantyne, a successful entrepreneur and writer, recalls a time—back when he was in his twenties—that he was addicted to visiting sports and news websites. “Fortunately,” he says, “I recognized the problem and over time developed a simple, quick and easy solution to snap out of it and get back to work.”
In his book The Perfect Day Formula, Ballantyne writes that many people procrastinate their day away by incessantly checking email, visiting news websites, reading text messages, and then returning to their inbox to start all over again.
“Habits, both good and bad, are hard to change,” says Ballantyne. And he explains that every time we do something out of habit the wiring in our brains strengthens. Thus, it behooves us to make good habits stronger and to get rid of bad habits.
And exactly, how do we break the bad habits?
“The solution is in having a trigger that reminds you to get back on track. Triggers are little tricks that interrupt your bad habits.” And the author shares a few examples to help stop procrastination habits:
“Turning off your phone or disconnecting from the internet stops you from repeatedly checking your email or text messages. Brushing your teeth can get you back on track and help you avoid mindless eating at night. Turning on loud, energetic music can be the trigger you need to finally start the exercise session you’ve been delaying all morning. Pulling out your checkbook and putting on a collared shirt could be the trigger you need to finally sit down and deal with your monthly bills.”
As it pertains to Ballantyne’s internet addiction, when he caught himself in the bad habit, he would open up Microsoft Word in his computer. That was the trigger he needed to snap him out of procrastinating. And he still uses it today when he’s “tempted by trouble” and it does the trick every time to return him to his writing.
Once he’s in Microsoft Word, he says, “Each word typed [is] a victory. Each sentence a battle won… Every victory makes it easier to achieve the next. [He gets] on a roll and then it’s hard to stop working and easy to avoid procrastination.”
And that is the lesson today: “Action begets action. And it starts with a simple trigger.”
As you see, triggers don’t need to be fancy or elaborate, you don’t need to spend money or ask others for help. If you want to snap out of a procrastinating funk, all you need is to identify and implement a trigger to get you into action mode.
What’s your trigger?
ACTION
TODAY: Identify the habit that gets you to procrastinate your day away. Then select a trigger to get you back into action mode. When you catch yourself in the bad habit, simply apply the trigger and get back to work. Slowly, you’ll get rid of your bad habit.
FUTURE: Create the intention of being aware of your habits. When you catch yourself doing what you don’t want to do, implement the trigger start working again.
Know someone who would like the idea of triggers? Please share this post with them via email, Facebook, Twitter, or LinkedIn, thank you!
by Helena Escalante | Accountability, Goals, Growth, Habits, Leadership, Mindset, Planning, Tools
Estimated reading time: 3 minutes, 7 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: Yes and No Are Choices We Make
— From: Habit Changers: 81 Game-Changing Mantras to Mindfully Realize Your Goals by M. J. Ryan
In yesterday’s post, we learned that our reaction to what happens is our choice. This prompted me to go back to M.J. Ryan’s book, Habit Changers, where she taught a client of hers that yes and no are choices we make.
Ryan’s client was an executive director of a nonprofit. As part of the coaching process, the homework for the client was to apply what she learned in the session to her life. What Ryan noticed was that the client would agree to do it but she’d skip it, and the next time they’d meet, the client had not done it. This went on for several sessions.
Ryan pointed this out to the client, and the client instantly had an epiphany: “That’s why people are so upset with me as a leader! I do that with everyone—I say yes to whatever they ask because I want to please them, and then I don’t follow through because I’ve got too much to do!”
The author says that not being able to say no, “stems from a desire to make others happy and avoid conflict.” The unfortunate part is that “it ends up creating more conflict and disappointment than if you had said no in the first place.” And Ryan proposes this apt mantra: “You can’t say yes if you can’t say no.”
She goes on to say that, “when you say yes to something you can’t follow through on, you’re not actually being helpful—you’re just appeasing those around you and ultimately causing bad feelings.”
By remembering that yes and no are choices we make and repeating that mantra, Ryan’s client “discovered that the more she could say no when she felt it, the more her yes was wholehearted.” The client’s story, fortunately, has a happy ending: “her follow-through improved dramatically and so did her team’s respect for her word.”
No matter how much we want to please or appease, saying yes when we don’t know if we’ll be certain to make it happen is not the best strategy. It puts our word and reputation on the line. Learning to say no is one of the best skills we can learn.
Have you ever found yourself saying yes out of a sense of not wanting to hurt anybody’s feelings or to appease someone? I know I have because I’m a pleaser. While I’m definitely not proud of those moments, they serve me as reminders of how I need to see the person and the favor asked of me as two different things. My relationship with the person who is asking is one thing and that, fortunately, doesn’t change (family, friend, client, etc). The favor that he/she is asking me to do is a completely different thing, and this frees me up to say yes or no based on my workload. Giving an answer to the task someone asks me to do is easier if I separate it this way in my mind.
How have you been able to learn to say no? Let me know in the comments here!
ACTION
TODAY: Remember that yes and no are choices we make, from tiny ones to major decisions. What choices will you make today?
FUTURE: Keep reminding yourself that yes and no are separate from the relationship that you have with the person who asks you to do something. While being on the receiving end of no may not be what the person who asked was expecting, if you explain that you won’t be able to fulfill what is asked of you and you don’t want to disappoint, your answer will be appreciated and respected.
Know someone who would like to read this post? Please share it with them via email, Facebook, Twitter, or LinkedIn, thank you!
