Estimated reading time: 3 minutes, 27 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: OB’s ways of being – Part 1
— From SHIFT: Creating Better Tomorrows: Winning at Work and in Life by Michael O’Brien
Michael O’Brien, better known as OB to his friends, is a successful executive coach with an incredibly inspiring story. An avid cyclist, he had a near-death accident when he was hit head-on by an SUV in 2011. The story has—thank goodness—a happy ending in OB surviving, being able to ride his bike again, and resume what we consider a “normal” life; but not after many surgeries, grueling pain, hardship, darkness and dismal forecasts by doctors and nurses as to what his life would be like after recovery.
Throughout his recovery journey, he says, “I had to shift from the perspective of victim to that of a victor… it was an opportunity to be defined, not by what had happened to me, but by how I responded to it. […] I created a mantra: ‘Make tomorrow better than today.’ It provided focus and hope… It was all about being responsible for improving my future.”
In his book he shares what he calls “ways of being,” (which are principles or observations that he learned along the way as he moved away from his “last bad day,”) in hope that they resonate with the readers of his book. They certainly resonated with me, and I hope this (somewhat abridged) version of OB’s ways of being will resonate with you too.
- “Be Mindful: Know your why; it makes your how easier. Know your values; they serve as your compass. Know your triggers; knowing them helps you quiet your emotional brain.”
- “Be Accepting: Acceptance helps you to own what is. It sets up the possibility of letting things go so you can move forward.”
- “Be Forgiving: When challenges happen or people cross you, it’s reasonable to feel [negative] emotions… as quickly as you can, shift to a new mindset [forgiveness is not for them, it’s for you].”
- “Be Balanced: The idea that life will reach some homeostasis with a perfect work-life balance is a myth. Those who achieve their best know what truly matters to their happiness. They prioritize to help them gain balance.”
- “Be Working: It’s okay if you are not the smartest [or fittest] person in the room, but never be the one who gets outhustled on the things that truly matter.”
- “Be Quiet: Life today is busy. […] If you want to go faster, slow down and find your quiet… you can call it meditation, centering or just simple breathing. Just don’t call it woo-woo. It’s not. It’s the secret sauce that will enhance your awareness, acceptance and balance.”
- “Be Kind: When you are kind, it begets more kindness. Start by being kind to yourself. Be mindful of what your inner critic tells you.”
- “Be Giving: Give, but expect nothing in return.”
- “Be Vulnerable: Asking for help isn’t a sign of weakness. Rather, it allows others to get closer to you—and for you to get closer to others.”
- “Be Present: You will never be able to change the events of yesterday. […] Be focused on the moment. This is what makes creating better tomorrows possible.”
Stay tuned because there are 10 additional ways of being from OB coming your way tomorrow.
In the mean time, I want to share the good news: I will have the honor of being a speaker along with OB and other awesome presenters at Unlearnings Live in New York City on April 23rd. I hope you can join us!
ACTION
TODAY: Pick one of OB’s ways of being and keep it in your mind all day. At the end of the day, jot down your thoughts and the actions that came to mind for you: Which way of being resonated with you most and why? What came up for you and what do you need to do to “make tomorrow better than today?”
FUTURE: Between today and tomorrow’s post, there will be a total of 20 of OB’s ways of being. Pick one per day–or one per week if you prefer–and practice it. The next day/week practice the next one, and so on.
Know someone whose life needs to shift with OB’s ways of being? Please share this post via email, Facebook or Twitter, thank you!