by Helena Escalante | Goals, Growth, Habits, Mindset, Tools
Estimated reading time: 3 minutes, 31 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA:
Put doubts in your doubts.
— From: Simple Is the New Smart: 26 Success Strategies to Build Confidence, Inspire Yourself, and Reach Your Ultimate Potential by Rob Fazio
Whenever we are going to do something, whether for the first or the umpteenth time, doubts may creep in. It’s natural, but if left unchecked, doubts can sometimes take over and paralyze or derail us.
Rob Fazio quotes a successful strategy by Al Petitpas, renowned psychologist to athletes, that helps “turn [around] people’s level of performance in sport and life.” The secret? Putting doubts in your doubts. Here’s how it works:
1. Scan for your doubts. Make a list of your doubts. Fear is usually the strongest of all, but it could also be “something that seems as harmless as a gut feeling about who is watching you or the setup of a situation.”
2. Understand and verify. Once you have a list, you can understand the source of your doubts by asking: “Where are these doubts coming from? What are the triggers? Are they real or did you create them?” And once you’ve answered, then ask “Is there any value?” This is important to verify, because, “for example… if you feel unprepared… that may be a cue to prepare more.” This step helps you see what is real and valid, and what isn’t.
3. Identify what the doubts are preventing. Those pesky doubts always have a way of stopping us short, even if temporarily, when they appear. “The way to counteract this is by asking yourself a simple, yet powerful question: ‘What would I achieve if I didn’t have any doubts?’ This question gives us forward momentum [and creates] a vision of success that focuses on the positive.”
4. Put doubt in your doubts. Our doubts usually start with “what if…” and then we imagine the worst-case scenario. So, what if we were to turn that on its head? Shift the negative “what ifs” into “questions that guide [you] toward success”:
“What if…
→ I wasn’t afraid?
→ I didn’t think about what others think?
→ I was confident right now?
→ I was able to get out of my own way?”
5. Shout out the doubt. Take the questions above and transform them into positive, strong statements that you can believe and that resonate with you and your values. “You need to believe in yourself or no one else will.
→ ‘I wasn’t afraid?’ becomes: ‘I know how to manage my fear.’
→ ‘I didn’t think about what others think?’ becomes: ‘I care more about what I think than what others think of me.’
→ ‘I was confident right now?’ becomes: ‘I am confident and strong.’
→ ‘I was able to get out of my own way?’ becomes: ‘Who I am is my strongest asset, and I help myself win.’”
6. Replace the doubt with doing. Action cures fear. “This is where the focus happens and you shift from doubt to doing. Identify one situation where your doubts have held you back, and attack. Leverage your newfound confidence and lean into your discomfort.”
7. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. By building the habit of doubting your doubts and taking action “you will have more power and control over yourself and debilitate your doubts.” More importantly, you will be able to take action where necessary in the case of true and valid doubts (e.g. more preparation in the above example), or dispel them if they arise out of fear or out of another emotion that is not serving you at this time.
ACTION
TODAY: Take one of your doubts and run it through the steps above. What did you learn? I’m sure a positive mind shift took place!
FUTURE: Make some time in the near future to create a list of doubts and run each doubt through the steps above. Take action where you need to. Rinse and repeat as often as needed. I’m sure you will be able to lift a burden off your shoulders (the stress we undergo from our doubts is not only unnecessary but also quite draining), and have peace of mind knowing that you are moving forward towards the completion of your goals.
Like what you read? Then don’t doubt for a second and help us spread the word via email, Facebook or Twitter. Your friends with doubts will thank you!
by Helena Escalante | Growth, Marketing, Mindset, Resources, Sales
Estimated reading time: 2 minutes, 48 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA:
How to apply the Law of the Category to your benefit.
— From The 22 Immutable Laws of Marketing: Violate Them at Your Own Risk! by Al Ries and Jack Trout (read a sample or watch an animated video summary of the book).
“What’s the name of the third person to fly the Atlantic Ocean solo? If you didn’t know that Bert Hinkler was the second person to fly the Atlantic, you might figure you had no chance at all to know the name of the third person. But you do. It’s Amelia Earhart. Now, is Amelia known as the third person to fly the Atlantic Ocean solo, or as the first woman to do so?”
You just witnessed in action one of the 22 Immutable Laws of Marketing, the Law of the Category:
“If you can’t be first in a category, set up a new category you can be first in.”
As professionals, we are constantly selling either products, services, or our efforts (say, our work to our boss) and we tend to focus on “better.” But better naturally brings a comparison: better than what? Better than X we say. And then a further comparison ensues. Ok, better than X, but can you top Y? The bar is constantly being raised to unattainable levels if we just focus on better, better, better. Let’s think new instead.
Marketing gurus Al Ries and Jack Trout say that while “everyone talks about why their brand is better… prospects have an open mind when it comes to categories. Everyone is interested in what’s new. Few people are interested in what’s better.”
By promoting the category you are first in, you can differentiate yourself from the competition. And since every category has a leader, you can become this way the market leader in your category.
So, what category are you first in? Let me know in the comments!
ACTION
TODAY: Figure out what category you are first in. If you sell a product or service this should not be difficult, as what differentiates you from the competition is a way to define your category. If you are not in sales directly, you can create your own category in the work that you do. Are you the first to try some new strategy or method? Or the first to try out some new technology? Or the first to teach something to someone? There are so many firsts that come to mind! What can you do that can give you a leg up, and create a category of “you did this first” in the mind of the people you report to? If you can’t come up with anything, check out this post: There is no such thing as a shortage of ideas or ping me and I can help.
FUTURE: One of the ways in which you can constantly create value is by reinventing yourself, your business/work, and your categories. Make a point to review your categories at least twice a year. Are you still dominant in the one you chose? If so, congrats and keep on going. Are you still dominant but many competitors are trying to snatch your title? Come up with another, complimentary category. That way you’ll have the strength of the first one plus the additional one, and this will certainly be a further differentiator in your clients’ minds.
Know someone who can benefit from reading this post? Please share it with them via email, Facebook or Twitter — thanks a lot!
by Helena Escalante | Goals, Growth, Habits, Mindset, Tools
Estimated reading time: 3 minutes, 9 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA:
There are 4 steps that we must go through if we want to change something
— From: Secrets of the Millionaire Mind: Mastering the Inner Game of Wealth by T. Harv Eker (read a sample)
I’d venture a guess that when you look at the different areas of your life, you are pulled in two different directions. One side pulls towards feeling immense gratitude and counting your blessings. The other one pulls towards feeling that there is so much potential in you, that there’s so much more that you can do, that you are pleased but not satisfied in the area of XYZ and that if you could only… __________ (fill in the blank with your answer).
Whatever that answer is, it just means that you need to change a few things (big or small) to make it happen. However, change is easier said than done. That’s why I love what T.Harv Eker has to say about it:
“The roots create the fruits.” Imagine a tree with fruits. “In life, our fruits are called our results. [If you] don’t like them, there aren’t enough of them, they’re too small, or they don’t taste good […] you cannot change the fruits that are already hanging on the tree. You can, however, change tomorrow’s fruits. But to do so, you will have to dig below the ground and strengthen the roots.”
By digging below the ground, of course, he means taking four steps to transform our current mental blueprint and start yielding better fruits. (While in this book the methodology is applied to wealth, I believe these steps apply to all changes we want to implement.)
- Awareness: “You can’t change anything unless you know it exists.”
- Understanding: “By understanding where your ‘way of thinking’ originates, you can recognize that it has to come from outside you.” You didn’t come to this world knowing what you know. This thought that is not letting you get the best yield of fruit has had to come from some external source—family, school, culture, work, etc.—and you simply adopted it as true.
- Disassociation: “Once you realize this way of thinking isn’t you [and it isn’t serving you or holding value for you anymore], you can separate yourself from it and choose in the present whether to keep it or let it go—based on who you are today, and where you want to be tomorrow.”
- Reconditioning: Feeding your mind with new patterns of thought and actions that will guide you towards achieving your goals.
ACTION
TODAY: Set aside some time to look at the area(s) in which you’d like to yield better fruits. Examine carefully the actions that have led you there. It’s hard to look objectively at yourself, but one way I find that helps me do this, is to pretend that I am giving advice to my best friend. Detaching myself that way let’s me look at my situation differently. The “best friend” approach takes all judgment and criticism away and instead provides just constructive feedback and resources.
FUTURE: Disassociate yourself from thought patterns that no longer serve you by being aware of them when they pop up in your mind. “Unlearn” those things or habits that have not worked for you. Determine which new patters of thought and action you are going to learn next. A good way of doing this is modeling after someone who has already reached the goal you want to attain. Look for those people, ask them, or read about them, look at their mindset so that you can start emulating it.
My wish for you is that your tree of life will soon bear plenty of your desired fruits!
***
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by Helena Escalante | Growth, Habits, Leadership, Mindset
TODAY’S IDEA:
Random acts of kindness equal extraordinary teams
— From: The Best Team Wins: The New Science of High Performance by Adrian Gostick and Chester Elton
I usually share ideas from books that I have read, yet in this case, I have not read the book because it just came out today… I just ordered it and can’t wait to have my nose in it!
What I learned (and loved!) about the book is what I saw about it in a video (below) from Dave Kerpen (featured here a few times) interviewing Chester Elton, one of the authors of The Best Team Wins: The New Science of High Performance. Elton shares 3 takeaways from the book, including a great story about the astronauts at the International Space Station.
Whether professionally or personally, I’m sure that you are part of one or many teams. Thus, I’m sure you will enjoy Elton talking about the importance of soft skills:
«The International Space Station… over six months, had three Russians, two Americans, one Canadian… The Canadian was the Commander, and he said “we exceeded every goal the six months we were up there.” Six big guys in a little tin can. And he said, “The biggest reason why we succeeded was… yes, we were all technically proficient, we all knew our jobs, and we were really smart, but we had one unwritten rule that made all the difference and it was this: that every astronaut had to perform one random act of kindness every day… And the message is ‘I care about you, I’m supporting you, I’m cheering for you, I love you, and we’re in this together.’ And they were little things… ‘I’ll clean up… I’ll help you with the calculations… let me cook dinner…’ That one unwritten rule was the difference between us having a great mission and an extraordinary mission.” One random act of kindness.»
Below is the video so that you can watch it. Well worth 5 minutes to hear the latest on how teams perform best nowadays (the story of the International Space Station starts at the 4-min mark). Some things may seem obvious, but I find that sometimes I need someone to point out the obvious to me so that the idea can sink in.
ACTION
TODAY & FUTURE: How about following in the footsteps of the astronauts and committing to perform a random act of kindness every day for your team members? I’m in!
Let me know in the comments or via Facebook or Twitter if you’re in too! Enlist your team members as well, and please tell them to join us.
by Helena Escalante | Goals, Growth, Habits, Mindset, Tools
TODAY’S IDEA:
This person is my teacher
— From: Habit Changers: 81 Game-Changing Mantras to Mindfully Realize Your Goals by M. J. Ryan
Years ago, I was going through a rough time at work because I had the boss from hell. My mother told me that I should think of that person as an inverse mentor, to learn how not to do things, and how not to treat people. That idea made me focus on something good that could come out of such a difficult situation. Since I was planning my escape, my new focus enabled me to be very clear—going forward—on the things that I did not want and that I was not willing to tolerate. (Thanks, Mom, I know you’re reading this!)
So, when I read “This person is my teacher,” in M. J. Ryan’s book, I knew I had to share it with you. The concept behind this Buddhist practice is powerful:
“It’s about seeing everyone who annoys, frustrates, angers or otherwise bothers you as someone who is providing you the opportunity to grow some positive quality in yourself—your equanimity, your kindness, your patience, your boundaries, your tolerance…It’s up to you to figure out what you are supposed to be learning.”
Give yourself the opportunity to keep growing and learning even in the most difficult and craziest of situations. By thinking “this person is my teacher” you’ll create awareness in you, and soon you’ll be making the most out of the situation.
ACTION
TODAY & FUTURE: When someone or something is bothering you think, “this person/situation is my teacher” and figure out what you need to learn from that experience. It’s hard and it’s no fun when you’re going through it, but it will be worth it for you in the end.
I found this to be life-changing and hope you do too. Let me know if you got any a-ha moments in the comments, please!
by Helena Escalante | Goals, Growth, Mindset, Planning
TODAY’S IDEA:
The ten-thousand-hour rule is only half true
— From: Focus: The Hidden Driver of Excellence by Daniel Goleman
A few years back, Malcolm Gladwell popularized the “10,000-Hour rule” in his book Outliers: The Story of Success. Briefly, the rule states that the key to mastering any skill at world-class level, is a matter of practicing around 10,000 hours.
However, Daniel Goleman, in his book Focus: The Hidden Driver of Excellence, states that the problem with the rule is that it’s only half true, despite the fact that it has “become sacrosanct gospel echoed on websites and recited as litany in high-performance workshops.” He explains, “If you’re a duffer at golf, say, and make the same mistakes every time you try a certain swing or putt, ten thousand hours of practicing that error will not improve your game. You’ll still be a duffer, albeit an older one.”
Goleman contacted Anders Ericsson, the psychology professor at Florida State University who is known as the world’s foremost “expert on expertise,” and the one who conducted the study of the 10,000 hours that Gladwell mentioned in his book. Ericsson said:
“You don’t get benefits from mechanical repetition but by adjusting your execution over and over to get closer to your goal. You have to tweak the system by pushing, allowing for more errors at first, as you increase your limits.”
The important thing to keep in mind is that this does not apply solely to the physical practice of something (sports, musical instruments, etc.). If you follow this advice of constantly improving and increasing your limits, you too can achieve the highest levels of performance in your field. This is great news because it means there’s hope for all of us.
My take on this is that the rule may not have to be so-daunting: while you may indeed need the 10,000-hours to achieve one of your goals with mastery, “good enough” sometimes works out very well too. And because good enough is a step on the road to mastery, you’ll have to go through there anyway. For example, if you are going to Italy on vacation and are learning Italian, with 10,000 hours you will likely be able to write an Italian best-seller, but with much less than that you will be able to speak well and have wonderful, memorable conversations on your trip.
Whether you want to achieve mastery or sufficiency, the best way to go about it is applying what Ericsson calls deliberate practice, “where an expert coach […] takes you through well-designed training over months or years and you give it your full concentration, […] and it always includes a feedback loop that lets you recognize errors and correct them.”
That’s the key formula: don’t spend the hours merely repeating something that doesn’t work. Spend the hours, instead, in studying people who have done what you want to do, hiring a coach to help you get there, focusing on improving, and getting out of your comfort zone. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat until you reach your goal.
ACTION
TODAY: Look at your most important or pressing goals and determine which ones need mastery and which ones need sufficiency. (This mere exercise, to me, was an enormous eye opener. It took the weight off my shoulders because I had mistakenly believed that I needed to achieve mastery in many things, when in reality sufficiency was all I needed).
FUTURE: Plan for mastery or sufficiency accordingly. Look for your role models. Who has achieved what you want to do? Are they within your reach? Do they offer coaching/training or some sort of teaching? If not, who can they recommend you work with? Or ask around for a competent coach/teacher/mentor in that area. Figure out how long it will take to get to where you want to go. Commit. Get started. Don’t look back. Enjoy the journey!
Any major a-ha moments while reading this? Please let me know or leave a comment!
