Do you remember Jack Mitchell talking about hugging as a mindset? Jack is the chairman of the Mitchell’s stores and a renowned personality in the field of extraordinary customer service. His second book, Hug Your People, talks about creating a Niceness Culture to inspire, empower, recognize and reward associates.
We’ve all heard that we shouldn’t mix business with pleasure. Mitchell says that the opposite is true, “Work and fun shouldn’t be considered antonyms. We think of them as synonyms.” And he points out that, “Scientists have discovered how quickly we adopt the emotional state of those around us by measuring the physiology, heart rate, blood pressure, skin temperature, etc., of two people sharing a conversation. As the conversation gets started, the vital signs of the two bodies are different. But after fifteen minutes, the physiological profiles of the two bodies become very similar.”
This point is incredibly important because “one associate’s happiness becomes the other associate’s happiness.” Mitchell says that in many companies, people feel guilty if they’re having a good time. It goes like this: “associates are chuckling over something when the big boss arrives and everyone immediately adopts a somber face and scurries to their desk to look like they’re ‘working.’ ”
When you have a Niceness Culture and this scenario happens, the boss joins in the laughter. Mitchell continues, “we want people to bring their real selves to work, not some artificial ‘business self.’ ” And he practices what he preaches: he joins in the laughter, the dancing, the singing and the overall cheering. But it doesn’t stop there.
Mitchell makes a point of fostering the fun in all he and his associates do. He will close the store for an evening and invite the associates to play poker. Or he will take all associates bowling. And he will also do it in smaller ways: at meetings he’ll ask everyone to think of positive words that start with a letter, write them down and share them in his CEO letter that goes out to everyone. Or some of his associates will kick off meetings by asking questions like, “What is one word that describes you?” Or “If your great-aunt died and left you more money than Bill Gates, what would you do with it?”
The sky is the limit in terms of what small or big actions you can take to have fun yourself and make your team have fun too. You can even start your own holidays! Work is such an important part of our lives that we should do something that we like and enjoy it fully!
“We don’t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.” George Bernard Shaw
ACTION
TODAY: How can you imbue some fun in the things you do? Think of small and big ways to do it. Can you record a fun message in your voice mail so that every caller that goes to voice mail gets a chuckle? Can you start a meeting in a fun way, such as “tell us something few people know about you” and then go around the room? Can you plan to go bowling or plan an ice-skating escapade during winter? Your imagination will lead you to come up with many fun ways to spice up your work and your business culture.
FUTURE: Commit to have more fun from now on. Think about fun “traditions” that you can establish either at work or at home, or both. Could you do an annual picnic? I once went to a “picnic” held at an office conference room where the organizers had set a red and white checkered table cloth and had sprinkled plastic ants all over it. It really was a fun touch and everyone had fun with the ants! One of my favorite invented “traditions” with my family in Spain—since we see each other once a year—is to celebrate all birthdays at the same time by adding the amount of years we will turn or have turned that year. Thus, last year we celebrated our 599 birthday! (Below is the picture of our cake). Could you do something similar at work, perhaps on a monthly basis? For example, “the September babies are turning 349 this year!” Think of fun and creative ways to celebrate and enjoy life.
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“The only purpose of starting is to finish,” writes Seth Godin in his remarkable book Linchpin. Finishing or shipping, as Godin calls it, “means hitting the publish button on your blog, showing a presentation to the sales team, answering the phone, selling the muffins, sending out your references. Shipping is the collision between your work and the outside world.”
But one of the things that makes shipping so difficult is thrashing. Thrashing is “the apparently productive brainstorming and tweaking we do for a project as it develops… sometimes thrashing is merely a tweak; other times it involves major surgery.”
Thrashing is essential; however, it’s the timing of the thrashing that can make or break a project. In the video below, Godin insists on thrashing early because that is when it’s easy and cheap. He is right. Professionals thrash early and then they get to work so as to ship with top quality and pride, respecting deadlines and other people’s time, and doing so within budget. It’s not a dream, it can be done.
The problem comes when people behave in an amateur way and do all the thrashing near the end. Godin continues, “the closer we get to shipping, the more people get involved, the more meetings we have, the more likely that CEO wants to be involved. And why not? What’s the point of getting involved early when you can’t see what’s already done and your work will probably be redone anyway? The point of getting everyone involved early is simple: thrash late and you won’t ship. Thrash late and you introduce bugs. Professional creators thrash early. The closer the project gets to completion, the fewer people see it and the fewer changes are permitted.”
Thrashing allowed at the end leads to missed deadlines, much stress, unnecessary changes, late nights, much heartache, frustration and resentment. Coordinating all the thrashing from teams of people that increasingly get larger as the deadline approaches is very difficult. “Projects stall as they trash. Nine women can’t have a baby in one month, no matter how closely they coordinate their work.”
So, what to do? Godin offers two solutions. Both will make people uncomfortable, yet they are the only way in which projects will be shipped on time and without the unnecessary heartache that too-many-cooks-in-the-kitchen brings. Here they are:
1. “Relentlessly limit the number of people allowed to thrash. That means you need formal procedures for excluding people, even well-meaning people with authority. And you need secrecy. If you have a choice between being surprised (and watching a great project ship on time) or being involved (and participating in the late launch of a mediocre project), which do you want? You must pick one or the other.”
2. “Appoint one person to run it. Not to co-run it or to lead at task force or to be on the committee. One person, a human being, runs it. [His or] her name on it. [His or] her decisions.”
In the video, Godin tells the story of how his boss loved to show up the day before with “just a little suggestion” that led to a domino effect of changes resulting in missed deadlines. Godin’s solution was to adopt a disciplined approach: thrash at the beginning and allow people to share their input and ideas early on. Then, have the thrashers sign a form stating that they have given their input and that they will not provide further input or changes after a certain deadline. This allows the people who are working on the project the necessary time for completion and shipping.
ACTION
TODAY: Think of ways in which you can apply early thrashing to your projects. How can you also instill the discipline in your team of thrashing early and shipping on time?
FUTURE: As you encounter the start of new projects, think of the optimal time and way in which thrashing should take place. Should it be a meeting? Should it be one-on-one? Should it be via a form? Think also of the time when thrashing should come to an end. Don’t veer away from the discipline of thrashing early and having a cut off point. Then take the best ideas, incorporate them into the project and get to work so that you can ship the best possible project on time and on budget.
Know someone who needs to stop thrashing at the end of a project? Please share this post with that person via email, Facebook or Twitter, thank you!
Breakfast has been lauded as the most important meal of the day. I love my breakfast and have no plans to stop eating it. So does author Dan Pink, “As a devout breakfast eater, I endorse this principle.” However, in his book WHEN, he says, “As someone paid to muck around in scientific journals, I’ve grown skeptical.”
While there are indeed virtues to breakfast, leading British research in nutrition points to the myths and merits and concludes, “The current state of scientific evidence means that, unfortunately, the simple answer is: I don’t know.”
So, you’re off the hook: you can eat or skip breakfast, as you prefer. But how about lunch? According to Pink, “social scientists are discovering that it’s far more important to our performance than we realize.”
The “often-maligned and easily dismissed meal called lunch” has been even touted as “for wimps” on TV. But that is about to change right now. A 2016 study between people who ate at their desk (known as sad desk lunch) and those who didn’t, found that “the non-desk lunchers were better able to contend with workplace stress and showed less exhaustion and great vigor not just during the remainder of the day but also a full one year later.”
Your lunch break, if indeed a break, can provide “an important recovery setting to promote occupational health and well-being—particularly for employees in cognitively or emotionally demanding jobs.”
The key here is not just your lunch meal but also the break itself. Pink goes on, “the most powerful lunch breaks have two key ingredients—autonomy and detachment. Autonomy—exercising some control over what you do, how you do it, and whom you do it with—is critical for high performance, especially on complex tasks. […] Detachment—both psychological and physical—is also critical. Staying focused on work during lunch, or even using one’s phone for social media, can intensify fatigue, according to multiple studies, but shifting one’s focus away from the office has the opposite effect.”
With all this evidence, Pink concludes, “Lunch is the most important meal of the day.”
Happy lunching!
ACTION
TODAY: If you suffer from sad desk lunch (especially if you live in the US where this is prevalent), know that there is help out there. Take a moment to check out the Box Lunch Lifestyle philosophy. It’s a great concept for lunch and oh-so-simple: plan and make your meal (ahead of time); then every weekday take time to eat, and take time to do something that you’ve always wanted, in as little as 30 minutes. You won’t mess with your weekends in case you have kids or social activities. The result? You’ll love your meal, you’ll eat healthy, and you’ll finally find the time to do something you’ve always wanted. Parts of this blog have been written during lunch breaks applying the Box Lunch Lifestyle ideas. It works for me, so I truly hope it works for you too!
FUTURE: Find a way to take a walk or to escape from your desk at lunch as much as you can. Exercise the autonomy and detachment that Dan Pink talks about. Socialize. Do something that takes your mind away from your work. Enjoy your food. Your imagination is the limit, so come up with a list of things to do during your lunch now that you know that it’s the most important meal of the day!
Know someone who eats at his or her desk? Share this post with them via email, Facebook or Twitter, thank you!
We’ve all heard the adage it’s better to give than to receive. We bought into it and became givers—which is wonderful—but we also became very bad receivers. T. Harv Eker, personal development guru and author of Secrets of the Millionaire Mind says, “The whole idea is ludicrous. What’s better, hot or cold, big or small, left or right, in or out? Giving and receiving are two sides of the same coin. Whoever decided that it is better to give than to receive was simply bad at math. For every giver there must be a receiver, and for every receiver there must be a giver. […] Both have to be in perfect balance to work one to one, fifty-fifty. And since giving and receiving must always equal each other, they must also be equal in importance.”
Giving gives us a feeling of fulfillment like no other. We’re joyful and grateful to be able to give. But what about when we are trying to give and the other person refuses to receive? It feels terrible, doesn’t it? Now, think about those times when we are the ones that are not willing to receive.
How many times have we refused to receive something that someone wants to give us? Or taken a step further, how many times have we refused to receive something that we want to give ourselves? How many times have we said no to an opportunity and refused it because we feel we’re undeserving, not worthy, or because we have impostor syndrome? This may very well be at the subconscious level, but if you’ve ever done something to sabotage your success in big or small ways (I’m not proud to say that I’m a repeat offender in this department…) you know what I’m talking about.
Think about it for a moment. There’s a part of you that feels worthy of some things (eating, working, driving); and there’s another that doesn’t (when someone wants to give you a gift or an opportunity that is bigger than what you consider acceptable). You are living with this duality that you made up in your mind.
Eker says, “Recognize that whether you are worthy or not it’s all a made-up ‘story.’ Nothing has meaning except for the meaning we give it. […] If you say you’re worthy, you are. If you say you’re not worthy, you’re not. Either way you will live into your story. […] Only the most evolved creature on the planet, the human being, has the ability to limit itself like this. One of my own sayings is, ‘If a hundred-foot oak tree had the mind of the human, it would only grow to be ten feet tall!’ So here’s my suggestion: since it’s a lot easier to change your story than your worthiness, instead of worrying about changing your worthiness change your story. It’s a lot faster and cheaper. Simply make up a new and much more supportive story and live into that.”
How about if the new story you adopt is that of being happy and grateful to receive; willing to enjoy and make the most out of the gift; and share the joy of receiving so that others can learn to be better receivers too?
ACTION
TODAY: Give yourself a gift that in the past you wouldn’t even have considered. You can buy something if you want, but if you don’t, it doesn’t have to be a physical thing. It could be taking time from your busy schedule to walk in nature, or taking a long, contemplative bath, or giving yourself a free evening and not cleaning the kitchen tonight (hahahaha) and using that time to read your favorite book instead. You can take it up a notch and give yourself the opportunity to get to know someone: go to lunch with a colleague and don’t talk about work. Send an email to a person you admire. You’re only limited by your imagination, so make it a lovely-and-unheard-of gift from you to you. Enjoy it, no guilt, no afterthought, no remorse, just plain acceptance and gratitude. Try it!
FUTURE: Keep in mind that giving and receiving is 50-50. So, when someone wants to give you something (from a compliment to a large gift), be open to receive it and be grateful. Gifts aren’t earned otherwise they’d be called compensation. They come from the heart, and the giver always thinks that you are worthy of the gift, so it’s just you the one who needs to change your story to be a better a receiver. Change it and enjoy receiving!
Know someone who needs to learn to receive? Please share this post with that person via email, Facebook or Twitter!
Are you lucky? According to Darren Hardy, author of The Compound Effect, “everyone has the opportunity to be ‘lucky,’ because beyond having the basics of health and sustenance, luck simply comes down to a series of choices.” He continues, “The difference between becoming fabulously rich, happy and healthy, or broke, depressed and unhealthy, is the choices you make throughout life. Nothing else will make a difference.”
Hardy was the publisher of SUCCESS magazine for many years, and he recalls a time when he asked Richard Branson, the founder of Virgin Group, if he thought luck had been a part of his success. Branson answered, “Yes, of course, we are all lucky. If you live in a free society, you are lucky. Luck surrounds us every day; we are constantly having lucky things happen to us, whether you recognize it or not. I have not been any more lucky or unlucky that anyone else. The difference is when luck came my way, I took advantage of it.”
We’ve all heard the maxim that says: luck is when preparation meets opportunity. Hardy agrees, yet he believes preparation and opportunity are not enough, thus he adds two more components to the luck formula:
Preparation (personal growth): “By consistently improving and preparing yourself—your skills, knowledge, expertise, relationships, and resources— you have the wherewithal to take advantage of great opportunities when they arise (when luck ‘strikes’).” Movie producer Samuel Goldwyn said, “The harder I work the luckier I get.”
Attitude (belief/mindset): “It’s simply a matter of seeing situations, conversations, and circumstances as fortuitous. You cannot see what you don’t look for, and you cannot look for what you don’t believe in.” Bernadette Jiwa, business and brand strategist, writes in her book Hunch, “every day is filled with opportunities, either seized or missed, ours for the taking if only we can learn to listen for them.” (Read post).
Opportunity (a good thing coming your way):
“Luck isn’t forced. It’s a natural occurrence, and it often shows up seemingly of its own accord.” And, even though opportunity is a good thing coming your way, sometimes it comes in disguise and shows up, as Albert Einstein said, in the middle of difficulty.
Action (doing something about it): “This is where you come in. However this luck was delivered to you… it’s now your job to act on it. […] So no more whining about the cards you were dealt, the great defeats you suffered, or any other circumstances. Countless people have more disadvantages and greater obstacles than you, and yet they’re wealthier and more fulfilled. Luck is an equal-opportunity distributor. Lady luck shines on all, but rather than having your umbrella overhead, you’ve got to have your face to the sky. When it comes down to it, it’s all you. There’s no other way around it.”
“You seldom, if ever, get lucky sitting down.” Zig Ziglar
ACTION
TODAY: Take a moment today to think of all the opportunities that you have in front of you: the wild ones, the sensible ones, the big ones, the small ones. The idea is not to spread yourself too thin and act on them all, but to start seeing opportunity all around you. You’ll soon realize how lucky you are and how you can increase your luck by acting on an opportunity should you decide to do so. Is there one that fits right in with your goals? Go for it! If not, no worries, keep this quote from Richard Branson in mind, “Opportunities are like buses – there’s always another one coming!”
FUTURE: Make a point of constantly learning and growing yourself (I know a blog called EntreGurus that can help you… 😉 ), seeing opportunity wherever you go, and being ready to act when luck presents itself. Make sure that the opportunities you act on are taking you further in the direction of your goals. Remember, if it’s not an absolutely ‘Hell, yeah!’ then say no. That’s how you maximize your luck.
Best of luck! 🍀
Please share this post with a lucky friend or colleague via email, Facebook or Twitter!
We all have an ego, and that’s a good thing. It pushes us to do bigger and better things, it fuels our desire to win, and drives us to succeed. But if we let it take the lead, it becomes a destructive force that “clouds our judgment and prevents us from seeing the world as it is,” say Leif Babin and Jocko Willink, authors of Extreme Ownership.
Further, if left unchecked, “ego clouds and disrupts everything: the planning process, the ability to take good advice, and the ability to accept constructive criticism… Often, the most difficult ego to deal with is your own.”
As philosopher and writer Michel de Montaigne said “I have never seen a greater monster or miracle than myself.” So, if ego has these two sides, how do we make sure that it doesn’t hijack us to take over but stays on the miracle side instead?
The authors say that it the ego must be in check at all times and we must operate with a high degree of humility. “Admitting mistakes, taking ownership and developing a plan to overcome challenges are integral to any successful team… strive to be confident, but not cocky.”
Babin relays a story of one of his clients: this was a manager faced with a superintendent subordinate who had more knowledge and experience than him. The subordinate had taken action—without running it first by the manager—that would cost the company lots of money.
Needless to say the manager was very upset. His ego had taken a hit because the subordinate had not cleared the action with him. With Babin’s help, the manager was able to check his ego and realize that the action may not have been deliberately done to hurt him or to see how much the subordinate could get away with. The manager said, “I’m sure he [the subordinate] thought he was doing the best for the immediate situation as it presented itself.” Over the ensuing conversation, Babin and the manager came to the conclusion that the subordinate acted in good faith, yet was unaware of the big picture. Thus, the subordinate’s action, taken without running it first by the manager, had cost the company hundreds of thousands of dollars.
It was the responsibility of the manager to explain the overall plan and mission to all subordinates, so that they could see the impact of their actions.
Had Babin and the manager not spoken, the manager would have likely confronted the subordinate and it would have resulted in a clash of egos. Instead, Babin recommended to the manager to take Extreme Ownership and not point fingers, but take full responsibility. Here’s what Babin said to the manager:
“This isn’t his fault, it’s yours. You are in charge, so the fact that he didn’t follow procedure is your fault. And you have to believe that, because it’s true. When you talk to him [the subordinate] you need to start the conversation like this: ‘Our team made a mistake and it’s my fault. It’s my fault because I obviously wasn’t as clear as I should have been in explaining why we have these procedures in place and how not following them can cost the company hundreds of thousands of dollars. You are an extremely skilled and knowledgeable superintendent. You know more about this business than I ever will. It was up to me to make sure you know the parameters we have to work within and why some decisions have got to be run through me. Now, I need to fix this so it doesn’t happen again.’ ”
Our egos don’t like to take blame, so it’s natural for anyone in a leadership position to find where the blame lies when something goes wrong in the work of a team. However, it’s incumbent upon us to check our egos and to make sure everyone knows how their actions fit in the big picture. The bottom line: “It’s about the mission and how best to accomplish it.”
Happy leading with ego in check!
ACTION
TODAY: Are you the leader of a team or part of a team? Do you and everyone on your team know how each individual’s work fits into the big picture? If not, explain to all or ask your leader. This will save you and your team much heartache!
FUTURE: As you embark on new projects, always seek to communicate to your team what the overall mission is and how each member fits within it. Take full responsibility and extreme ownership of everything that happens. Operate with humility and check your ego constantly, that way you’ll ensure it will drive you to succeed.
Know someone who needs to check their ego? Please share this post with that person via email, Facebook or Twitter, thank you!
TODAY’S IDEA: Work is play, it’s fun
