by Helena Escalante | Goals, Growth, Habits, Leadership, Mindset
Estimated reading time: 2 minutes, 42 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: OB’s ways of being – Part 2
— From SHIFT: Creating Better Tomorrows: Winning at Work and in Life by Michael O’Brien
Liked yesterday’s post with OB’s first 10 ways of being? I hope you did. I loved it: while short, each way of being is deeply packed with wisdom!
I’m sure you’re eager to find out what are the rest of OB’s ways of being today. Here you go:
- “Be Curious: Create the space in your conversations that will give trust a chance to sprout. Don’t forget to be curious with yourself too. You never know what you can accomplish until you ask yourself.”
- “Be Attentive: Listen in order to connect with others. Don’t listen to reply. […] Acknowledge and validate what you hear to build trust with others.”
- “Be Open: Be open to the possibility that your way may not be the best way. Fight your ego’s addiction to being right.”
- “Be Grateful: Celebrate the little things daily. They help attract even bigger things to be helpful for.”
- “Be Courageous: Fear is normal. […] If you are striving to be your best, you will have moments when your inner critic will weave a fearful narrative. Listen to it, accept it, then move forward in spite of your fears. That’s called courage.”
- “Be Selective: You are who you hang out with. Remember, you always have a choice in your relationships. You can stay a victim to them, leave them, accept them, change your perspective, or improve them. Choose with wisdom.”
- “Be Flexible: Know that even though your situation may seem bleak, there are always hidden options. Keep seeking.”
- “Be Your Scars: You will make mistakes. We all do. Don’t hide them from view. Own them. They define you and can make your tomorrows better.”
- “Be an Inspiring Storyteller: Stories are powerful. They make sense of the world and bring us closer together… but they can also tear us down. Resist telling those kinds of stories and share stories that motivate and inspire us to new heights.”
- “Be Happy: Choose to be happy now… [express] your gratitude and [pursue] your potential. This choice will lead you to more happiness and success.”
A reminder that if you are in New York City on April 23, you are cordially invited to Unlearnings Live, where OB and I will be speaking, along with many other great presenters. I hope you can join us!
ACTION
TODAY: Pick one of today’s OB’s ways of being and keep it in your mind all day. At the end of the day, jot down your thoughts and the actions that came to mind for you: Which way of being resonated with you most and why? What came up for you and what do you need to do to “make tomorrow better than today?”
FUTURE: Between yesterday and today’s posts, there are a total of 20 of OB’s ways of being. Pick one per day–or one per week if you prefer–and practice it. The next day/week practice the next one, and so on. Keep a journal or a notebook so that at the end of the period, you can jot down your thoughts and the actions that came to mind for you. According to the way of being that you selected, what do you need to do in that area to “make tomorrow better than today?”
Know someone whose life needs to shift with OB’s ways of being? Please share this post via email, Facebook or Twitter, thank you!
by Helena Escalante | Goals, Growth, Habits, Leadership, Mindset
Estimated reading time: 3 minutes, 27 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: OB’s ways of being – Part 1
— From SHIFT: Creating Better Tomorrows: Winning at Work and in Life by Michael O’Brien
Michael O’Brien, better known as OB to his friends, is a successful executive coach with an incredibly inspiring story. An avid cyclist, he had a near-death accident when he was hit head-on by an SUV in 2011. The story has—thank goodness—a happy ending in OB surviving, being able to ride his bike again, and resume what we consider a “normal” life; but not after many surgeries, grueling pain, hardship, darkness and dismal forecasts by doctors and nurses as to what his life would be like after recovery.
Throughout his recovery journey, he says, “I had to shift from the perspective of victim to that of a victor… it was an opportunity to be defined, not by what had happened to me, but by how I responded to it. […] I created a mantra: ‘Make tomorrow better than today.’ It provided focus and hope… It was all about being responsible for improving my future.”
In his book he shares what he calls “ways of being,” (which are principles or observations that he learned along the way as he moved away from his “last bad day,”) in hope that they resonate with the readers of his book. They certainly resonated with me, and I hope this (somewhat abridged) version of OB’s ways of being will resonate with you too.
- “Be Mindful: Know your why; it makes your how easier. Know your values; they serve as your compass. Know your triggers; knowing them helps you quiet your emotional brain.”
- “Be Accepting: Acceptance helps you to own what is. It sets up the possibility of letting things go so you can move forward.”
- “Be Forgiving: When challenges happen or people cross you, it’s reasonable to feel [negative] emotions… as quickly as you can, shift to a new mindset [forgiveness is not for them, it’s for you].”
- “Be Balanced: The idea that life will reach some homeostasis with a perfect work-life balance is a myth. Those who achieve their best know what truly matters to their happiness. They prioritize to help them gain balance.”
- “Be Working: It’s okay if you are not the smartest [or fittest] person in the room, but never be the one who gets outhustled on the things that truly matter.”
- “Be Quiet: Life today is busy. […] If you want to go faster, slow down and find your quiet… you can call it meditation, centering or just simple breathing. Just don’t call it woo-woo. It’s not. It’s the secret sauce that will enhance your awareness, acceptance and balance.”
- “Be Kind: When you are kind, it begets more kindness. Start by being kind to yourself. Be mindful of what your inner critic tells you.”
- “Be Giving: Give, but expect nothing in return.”
- “Be Vulnerable: Asking for help isn’t a sign of weakness. Rather, it allows others to get closer to you—and for you to get closer to others.”
- “Be Present: You will never be able to change the events of yesterday. […] Be focused on the moment. This is what makes creating better tomorrows possible.”
Stay tuned because there are 10 additional ways of being from OB coming your way tomorrow.
In the mean time, I want to share the good news: I will have the honor of being a speaker along with OB and other awesome presenters at Unlearnings Live in New York City on April 23rd. I hope you can join us!
ACTION
TODAY: Pick one of OB’s ways of being and keep it in your mind all day. At the end of the day, jot down your thoughts and the actions that came to mind for you: Which way of being resonated with you most and why? What came up for you and what do you need to do to “make tomorrow better than today?”
FUTURE: Between today and tomorrow’s post, there will be a total of 20 of OB’s ways of being. Pick one per day–or one per week if you prefer–and practice it. The next day/week practice the next one, and so on.
Know someone whose life needs to shift with OB’s ways of being? Please share this post via email, Facebook or Twitter, thank you!
by Helena Escalante | Accountability, Growth, Habits, Leadership, Mindset, Productivity, Resources, Tools
Estimated reading time: 3 minutes, 13 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: Block the block
— From What to Do When it’s Your Turn (and it’s Always Your Turn) by Seth Godin
We’ve all been told that we need to be motivated in order to work or take action on something.
I think it’s important to make a distinction in terms of what we understand and call motivation:
Intrinsic Motivation – this is the reason WHY we do what we do and we take the actions that we take. We work because we need to earn money; we get together with friends because we want to have fun. These examples are simplistic, but they paint the picture. We seldom question this motivation and simply accept it as part of who we are and what we do.
But there’s a second kind of motivation, and that is the one we are talking about here:
Momentary motivation – this is feeling like doing something at a particular moment. Some people think “they need the right cosmic alignment and the proper mood” to start doing their work.
Writers, for example, often cite writer’s block as the reason why they can’t write. “But this is a form of hiding,” says Seth Godin. And I can only imagine that every profession has its own form of a block: the entrepreneur’s block, the lawyer’s block, the architect’s block, the coach’s block, the chef’s block, the nurse’s block, the designer’s block… you’re blocked when you simply don’t find the willingness within you (your mind is not collaborating…) to do the tasks that you must get done, at that moment, to accomplish your work.
What’s the way out? How can you block the block from happening again? Momentary motivation techniques might work, but to ensure that you get rid of the block once and for all, the best antidote is to create a habit.
“A habit of showing up on a regular basis, of writing when it’s time to write [or of (fill-in-the-blank) when it’s time to (fill-in-the-blank)], raising your hand when asked, pitching in every single time. The habit is part of what it means to do work. Your posture of leaning into this opportunity, of connecting and creating and picking yourself: this is your work. How motivated you are today has nothing to do with the opportunity and the obligation you face.”
Building a habit will add consistency to your work, give you a certain routine and schedule, and avoid the block.
ACTION
TODAY: Think of the areas in your life where you sometimes experience a “block.” Make a list of the things that the block represents: what are you hiding from? It could be fear of failure (e.g. by being blocked you don’t write, and if you don’t write then there is no chance you’ll fail); it could be fear of success (e.g. by being blocked you don’t write and thus, there’s no opportunity for success, because you fear that if you succeed wildly your friends will leave you); it could be anything. This is as unique as you, be honest with yourself and give yourself the time to really dive deep and understand what the block means to you. It will be enlightening.
FUTURE: Based on what the block means to you, create the atmosphere and schedule the time so that you can build your habit, overcome the block and thrive. What will building your habit entail? Do you need to go somewhere to work without distraction for a period of time with certain frequency? Do you need to prep some physical or digital tools ahead of time so that you can perform? Do you need to declutter your desk (or the kitchen table) to work from there? Make it as easy as possible to create the habit so that you can have the odds in your favor to succeed.
Know someone who needs to get rid of the block? Help them get unblocked today by sharing with them this post via email, Facebook or Twitter!
by Helena Escalante | Creativity, Growth, Leadership, Marketing, Mindset, Opportunity, Planning
Estimated reading time: 3 minutes, 37 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: Best in the world
— From The Dip: A Little Book That Teaches You When to Quit (and When to Stick) by Seth Godin
The best in the world. Sounds great, doesn’t it? But why is it important? And what exactly does “the best in the world” mean?
A simple Google search for time management yields 138 million results. This implies that there are 138 million resources in cyberspace to help us figure out how to manage our precious time wisely.
Because we are all pressed for time and we don’t like taking risks are the reasons why being #1 matters. “If you’ve been diagnosed with cancer of the navel, you’re not going to mess around with by going to a lot of doctors. You’re going to head straight for the ‘top guy,’ the person who is ranked the best in the world. […] When you’re hiring someone for your team, do you ask your admin to give you the average résumé, or do you ask him to screen out all but the very best qualified people?”
“With limited time or opportunity to experiment, we intentionally narrow our choices to those at the top.” Also, “being at the top matters because there’s room at the top for only a few. Scarcity makes being at the top worth something.”
People who are looking at doing business with you (or with the business that you represent) will be wondering if you are the best in the world. And that deserves a new definition that Godin describes majestically:
“Best as in: best for them, right now, based on what they believe and what they know. And in the world as in: their world, the world they have access to.”
If I’m looking for a dry cleaning service that doesn’t use toxic chemicals, I’ll go with the one that uses organic products to clean, that offers a quick turnaround service, that is affordable, and that is close to where I live. That’s the best in the world for me.
“World is a pretty flexible term… Now there are a million micromarkets [and] each micromarket still has a best. And being the best in that world is the place to be.”
The consumer is the one that decides what is best, thus the term is subjective. And the term world is “selfish,” because it’s the world that the consumer defines based on preference and convenience.
The world got bigger with the Internet opening up a lot of different options to fit our needs and wants. Yet the world also got smaller because of specialization and niching down. Since we cannot be everything to everyone, and the mass market is changing rapidly towards specialization and customization, being the best in the world just got a new definition that, thankfully, involves us all if we want to pursue it.
ACTION
TODAY: Think about your micromarket and write down the answers to these questions: What do you offer that no one else does? What can you be the best in the world at? What needs to happen for you to position yourself to be the best in the world—in your world—however big or small? Also, talk to a few clients or customers today and ask them how they would describe what you do and what value you provide. The answers will reveal things that you may have either taken for granted or would have never even crossed your mind, but that are valuable to your customers.
FUTURE: Talk to as many customers as you can. Find out what are the key aspects of your business that you have to highlight and promote according to what your customers define as best in their world. Then set up a road map to get there. Work on becoming the best in your customers’ world and you and your business will flourish.
Note that this applies to business as well as to any other personal endeavors that you’re involved in: How can you be the best friend in the world? Or the best volunteer in your church? Or the best parent who organizes the bake sale for your child’s school this year? Our lives are made up of different mini-worlds in which best in the (mini)world applies too, for our benefit and the benefit of all involved.
Know someone who needs to read this? Be the best friend in their world today by sharing with them this post via email, Facebook or Twitter!
by Helena Escalante | Celebration, Collaboration, Creativity, Goals, Growth, Leadership, Mindset
Estimated reading time: 3 minutes, 40 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: The Rosenzweig Technique
— From Footprints on the Moon by Seth Godin
The Rosenzweig Technique is named after Franz Rosenzweig, “an author who served in the First World War. He wrote his ideas on postcards and sent them to his mom for safekeeping. He turned them into a book years later.”
Last Summer, a bunch of friends and I exchanged postcards through the mail according to a slightly modified version of The Rosenzweig Technique. It was inspiring, fun and, most of all, we all found ourselves giddy when going to our mailboxes to pick up the correspondence for that day. I’m inviting you to do the same today! While you may or may not write a book out of this, the postcards are a great exercise to share ideas with yourself as you are writing them, and then to reflect over those ideas when you receive them.
Let me share technique as Seth Godin describes it:
“Get a stack of blank postcards… address each of them to yourself, probably at home.
The challenge is simple: Four times a day, fill a postcard with an idea, a message to yourself from today to tomorrow. And then mail it.
A few days later, handwritten ideas from your past yourself will begin to arrive.
Each day, when you get home from work, you’ll get three or four (or even five) ideas worth reading.
As each arrives, your job is to take that germ and write it up, expand it, put it into the word processor on your computer. It’s the end of the day, so there’s no need to worry about checking your email.
Do this for five weeks, for 35 days, for 140 cards. Do it without cease, without hesitation, without regard for whether it’s perfect or not.”
The modified version that I did with my friends was as follows:
- Send a postcard on Day 1 to four people in the group.
- Send a postcard on Day 2 to another four people in the group.
- Keep sending postcards as the days progress to groups of four until everyone has sent a postcard to every member of the whole group.
- Then start again and send more postcards to the first group of four, and so on, until the cycle is complete for 35 days.
While the thoughts that each one of us shared in the postcards were completely spontaneous and random, and we had no control as to when they would be delivered (we live in different countries), the postcards that I got in the mail always seemed to arrive at the right time with the right message on them. I remember, for instance, that I was stuck with a project one day and received a postcard that said, “move forward imperfectly.” Boom!
ACTION
TODAY: Decide if you want to embark in doing The Rosenzweig Technique over the next 35 days. I highly recommend it because of the insights, inspiration and ideas that you can share and receive with yourself/ your friends. Plus, the reflection that this brings as you are writing about the postcards that you receive is invaluable: you’re guaranteed to get more insights, solve a few challenges here and there, and expand your mind. However, if four ideas/thoughts a day for 35 days is too much, feel free to modify the technique however you see fit (for example, one idea per day). Don’t work for the specifics of the technique, instead, make the technique work for you! If you are ready, go get your postcards and your stamps and get started today.
FUTURE: Do you want to do The Rosenzweig Technique with me? I’m starting on March 21 to commemorate Spring, and I’d love to do the modified version again, this time with my fellow gurupies*! 🙂 If you are interested, send me an email (no later than March 19) letting me know that you are in, and I will send you all the details. It doesn’t matter where you live, postcards are used to traveling all over the world. This should be a lot of fun and we will all learn a ton from each other and from our own reflections. Hope you will join me — really looking forward to this! Sorry, this has already been done. We had a blast! If we decide to do it again I’ll post about it so that you can join. 🙂
* Gurupie = blend of guru and groupie = how I fondly refer to the EntreGurus’ community, because we all follow the ideas of the gurus.
Know someone who would like to join the upcoming exchange-of-postcards group? Let that person know via email, Facebook or Twitter, thank you!
by Helena Escalante | Goals, Growth, Habits, Leadership, Mindset, Opportunity, Resources, Tools
Estimated reading time: 2 minutes, 34 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: Reduce the risk
— From: Habit Changers: 81 Game-Changing Mantras to Mindfully Realize Your Goals by M. J. Ryan
M. J. Ryan relates a story from Sallie Krawcheck, who is one of the most followed “Thought Leaders” on LinkedIn with over 900,000 followers and who was number seven on the Forbes list of The World’s 100 Most Powerful Women of 2005.
Included among the many hats Sallie has worn in the past, were “the daunting roles of CEO of the newly formed Smith Barney and later president of the Global Wealth and Investment Management division of Bank of America.” When she was offered those roles—which she accepted—she realized that she “was risking ‘public humiliation’ if she failed, but stood the chance of gaining tremendous influence and impact if she succeeded.”
Reduce the risk was Sallie’s mantra and strategy when facing challenges and opportunities. What this meant was “putting a strong team in place with talents and experience that complemented rather than duplicated hers.”
Reducing the risk, then, means intentionally creating an environment and putting fail-safes in place, so that you have the greatest probability of succeeding. Think about it for a moment: it makes perfect sense. Keep in mind that there are always ways in which you can reduce your risk too and change the environment to benefit you.
For example, you can save enough money to have a fall back cushion “if things don’t work out as a start-up CEO; [you can keep] ties to your old community as you move to a new, unfamiliar place; or [you can try out] a new hobby before committing totally.” Big or small, reducing the risk can take many forms, but it always works in your favor.
Now, this doesn’t mean that all risks are worth taking (here’s a great article by Bryan Tracy).You still have to analyze each one that comes your way. But by reducing the risk on those challenges or opportunities that you decide to accept, you’ll have the greatest chance to succeed!
ACTION
TODAY: Think about a challenge or opportunity that you have in front of you now. Yes, that one which you have been pondering without being able to move forward one way or another. Would you be closer to saying yes to it if you could reduce the risk and set up everything-in-your-power for you to succeed? If the answer is no, drop it (remember the easiest way to say no). But if your answer is yes, then make a list of the people, resources, things and actions that you will need to put in place and take one action today that will move you closer to achieving this.
FUTURE: Start creating the habit to look at risk differently: as something that can be reduced so as to maximize your chances for success. Next time you are looking at accepting a challenge or opportunity, create a list of the people, resources, things and actions that you will need to raise your chances of success. Then move forward to implement your fail-safes, and you’ll be on your way very soon!
Know someone who needs to reduce the risk? Please share this post with that person via email, Facebook or Twitter, thank you!
