by Helena Escalante | Growth, Leadership, Mindset, Miniseries, Tools
Links to other parts of the miniseries:
Leadership: Debunking 5 myths
Leadership: Developing influence one step at a time: Position
Leadership: Developing influence one step at a time: People Development and Personhood
Leadership: Climbing the steps
Estimated reading time: 3 minutes, 9 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: Leadership: Developing influence one step at a time: Permission & Production
— From Leadership 101: What Every Leader Needs to Know by John C. Maxwell
Yesterday we learned about the first level of leadership: position, and today we will continue expanding on this topic. John C. Maxwell, author of Leadership 101, quotes Fred Smith (CEO of Fedex) as saying; “Leadership is getting people to work for you when they are not obligated.” And this is precisely what starts to happen as soon as you jump to level 2 of leadership and continue along the subsequent levels.
Level 2: Permission—People follow because they want to. “A person on the ‘permission’ level will lead by interrelationships. The agenda is not the pecking order but people development. On this level, the leader donates time, energy and focus on the follower’s needs and desires. […] People who are unable to build solid, lasting, relationships will soon discover that they are unable to sustain long, effective leadership.”
“Leadership begins with the heart, not the head. […] You can love people without leading them, but cannot lead people without loving them.”
Maxwell cautions us not to skip this level, as it is the most often skipped one. Taking the time to develop and nurture relationships is important, and it involves a process that “provides the glue and much of the staying power for long-term, consistent production.”
Here are the characteristics to master on this level before advancing to the third one:
Level 2: Permission/Relationship
- Possess a genuine love for people.
- Make those who work with you more successful.
- See through other people’s eyes.
- Love people more than procedures.
- Do “win-win” or don’t do it.
- Include others in your journey.
- Deal wisely with difficult people.
Level 3: Production—People follow because of what you have done for the organization. Maxwell says there is a major difference between levels 2 and 3. “On the ‘relationship’ level people get together just to get together… On the ‘results’ level people come together to accomplish a purpose.” The like to get together for the sake of it, but because they are results-oriented, they love to get together to accomplish things.
And it is at this level indeed where good things start happening: “Profit increases. Morale is high. Turnover is low. Needs are being met. Goals are being realized. Accompanying the growth is the ‘big mo’—momentum. Leading and influencing others is fun. Problems are solved with minimum effort… Everyone is results-oriented. In fact, results are the main reason for the activity.”
Based on this, here are the characteristics to master before moving on to the next level:
Level 3: Production/Results
- Initiate and accept responsibility for growth.
- Develop and follow a statement of purpose.
- Make your job description and energy an integral part of the statement of purpose.
- Develop accountability for results, beginning with yourself.
- Know and do the things that give a high return.
- Communicate the strategy and vision for the organization.
- Become a change-agent and understand timing.
- Make the difficult decisions that will make a difference.
The levels keep getting better and better, don’t they? Stay tuned for tomorrow’s installment of this miniseries where we’ll learn about levels 4 and 5.
ACTION
TODAY: Think about leaders you know who are at these levels. What can you learn about them? Are you at any of these levels? What actions can you take to proactively master the characteristics you need to advance to the next level?
FUTURE: Have you noticed that each level stands on the previous one? That’s right. Keep this in mind always as you move up: you can’t neglect the base when you move on to higher levels. It’s like doing algebra: you have to draw on a solid, basic knowledge of addition, subtraction, multiplication, and division, even though what you are doing now is much more advanced and complex than at the beginning.
Know someone who wants to learn more about leadership? Please share this post and the upcoming ones in this miniseries, thank you! Email, Facebook or Twitter.
by Helena Escalante | Growth, Leadership, Mindset, Miniseries, Tools
Links to other parts of the miniseries:
Leadership: Debunking 5 myths
Leadership: Developing influence one step at a time: Permission & Production
Leadership: Developing influence one step at a time: People Development and Personhood
Leadership: Climbing the steps
Estimated reading time: 3 minutes, 0 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: Leadership: Developing influence one step at a time: Position
— From Leadership 101: What Every Leader Needs to Know by John C. Maxwell
In this post, I had mentioned my surprise at learning that each of us influences at least ten thousand other people during our lifetime. (!) “So the question is not whether you will influence someone, but how you will use your influence.”
Continuing with this miniseries on leadership from John C. Maxwell’s book Leadership 101, and inspired by the statement above, I want to expand on what the author calls the levels of leadership. Maxwell says there are five levels—or steps—that we all take along the leadership journey. We can develop our influence and leadership potential by understanding what each step entails. And by allowing ourselves the necessary time to dwell and grow through each level, we can become the leaders we want to be.
So, what are the levels of leadership, you ask? Today we’ll take a look at the first one. Come back tomorrow to learn about the next ones.
Level 1: Position—People follow because they have to. “This is the basic entry level of leadership. The only influence you have is that which comes with a title. People who stay at this level get into territorial rights, protocol, tradition and organizational charts. These things are not negative unless they become the basis for authority and influence, but they are poor substitutes for leadership skills.”
In here Maxwell makes an important distinction: “A real leader knows the difference between being the boss and being a leader.”
| The boss: |
The leader: |
| Drives his workers |
Coaches his workers |
| Depends on authority |
Depends on goodwill |
| Inspires fear |
Inspires enthusiasm |
| Says “I” |
Says “we” |
| Fixes the blame for the breakdown |
Fixes the breakdown |
At this level, unfortunately, security is not based on talent. Instead, it’s based solely on title, which means that this step is often reached by appointment (whereas all subsequent levels are gained by ability). And since “people will not follow a positional leader beyond his stated authority,” this also means that the so-called followers at this stage “will only do what they have to do when they are required to do it. Low morale is always present… [and] when the leader lacks confidence, the followers lack commitment.”
What to do if you are at this level or know someone who is? Develop the following characteristics until you exhibit them with excellence, and you’ll then be ready to move up.
Level 1: Position/Rights
- Know your job description thoroughly.
- Be aware of the history of the organization.
- Relate the organization’s history to the people of the organization (in other words, be a team player).
- Accept responsibility.
- Do your job with consistent excellence.
- Do more than expected.
- Offer creative ideas for change and improvement.
Come back tomorrow to continue reading about the subsequent levels of leadership. You’ll learn the characteristics you need to develop in each step to move up the leadership ladder.
ACTION
TODAY: We’ve all interacted at some point with someone who exerts positional leadership and calls him/herself the boss as per the description above (yikes!). What can you learn from those people so as to not do it yourself? Consider them inverse mentors.
FUTURE: As uncomfortable as it is to be around someone at this level of leadership, be compassionate and remember the saying “every master was once a disaster.” Or if this was you at some point, stop cringing and forgive yourself. We all start somewhere in our leadership journey and build from there. Maybe if you extend a helping hand, offer friendly advice, or give helpful feedback, you’ll be able to assist the positional leader to move along the path toward the next step.
Know someone who wants to learn more about leadership? Please share this post and the upcoming ones in this miniseries, thank you! Email, Facebook or Twitter.
by Helena Escalante | Growth, Leadership, Mindset, Miniseries, Sales, Tools
Links to other parts of the miniseries:
Leadership: Developing influence one step at a time: Position
Leadership: Developing influence one step at a time: Permission & Production
Leadership: Developing influence one step at a time: People Development and Personhood
Leadership: Climbing the steps
Estimated reading time: 4 minutes, 10 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: Leadership: Debunking 5 myths
— From Leadership 101: What Every Leader Needs to Know by John C. Maxwell
What is leadership? With lots of definitions and books on leadership, you’d think the answer to this might be an easy one, but it’s not. The essence of leadership and its different manifestations can sometimes be confusing. Why? Because nowadays the label “leader” is tossed around often and sometimes misused to describe position, knowledge or some other attribute as opposed to true leadership.
To that effect, in Leadership 101, John C. Maxwell sets a simple definition that is right on point:
“True leadership cannot be awarded, appointed or assigned. It comes only from influence. [Thus] the true measure of leadership is influence—nothing more, nothing less.”
So, how do we find and measure influence?
In this miniseries, we will first start by debunking the five most common myths or misconceptions that account for the majority of the confusing definitions leadership and, in subsequent posts, we will see how influence can be developed.
1. The Management Myth: “A widespread misunderstanding is that leading and managing are one and the same.” As Rear Admiral Grace Hopper so aptly put it, “you manage things, you lead people.” Maxwell says, “The best way to test whether a person can lead rather than just manage is to ask [him/her] to create positive change. Managers can maintain direction, but they can’t change it. To move people in a new direction, you need influence.”
2. The Entrepreneur Myth: “People assume that all salespeople and entrepreneurs are leaders. But that’s not always the case.” Maxwell cites the example of Ron Popeil, an inventor of gadgets and celebrity in his own right who became a household name by appearing in numerous infomercials. “Popeil is certainly enterprising, innovative and successful… but that doesn’t make him a leader. People may be buying what he has to sell, but they’re not following him. At best, he is able to persuade people for a moment, but he holds no long-term influence with them.”
3. The Knowledge Myth: “Knowledge is power,” is the famous phrase by Sir Francis Bacon, and Maxwell says that, “most people, believing that power is the essence of leadership, naturally assume that those who possess knowledge and intelligence are leaders.” Yet the author points out that this is not automatically true because there are numerous research scientists and philosophers whose knowledge is, “so high that it’s off the charts, but whose ability to lead is so low that it doesn’t even register on the charts. IQ doesn’t necessarily equate to leadership.”
4. The Pioneer Myth: “Another misconception is that anyone who is out in front of the crowd is a leader. But being first isn’t always the same as leading.” Maxwell points out the case of Sir Edmund Hillary, the first man to reach the summit of Mount Everest. While being the pioneer comes with much merit, that doesn’t make him a leader. Many climbers have done the same afterward, but they aren’t following him. “To be a leader, a person has to not only be out front, but also have people intentionally coming behind him, following his lead, and acting on his vision.”
5. The Position Myth: “The greatest misunderstanding about leadership is that people think it is based on position, but it’s not,” says Maxwell. In the military, officers can pull rank and in business, bosses get away with people being cooperative because their livelihood is at stake. People respond to their superiors and that is mistaken as leadership. Maxwell quotes Stanley Huffty: “It’s not the position that makes the leader; it’s the leader that makes the position.” Think about some of the known examples of leaders of a team or company who resign or are forced out and the colleagues follow: the leaders may lose the position, but not the influence because, as Harry A. Overstreet said, “The very essence of all power to influence lies in getting the other person to participate.”
And the corollary to this last quote is one that Maxwell is famous for saying:
“He who thinks he leads, but has no followers, is only taking a walk.”
While leaders may have some or all of these attributes within them, they must still have influence for people to follow them and act upon their vision.
Come back tomorrow for the next installment of this miniseries to learn how influence can be developed.
ACTION
TODAY: Think about the leaders that surround you. Think about their influence. Who do you follow because you truly believe in them? Who do you follow because they have rank or authority over you?
FUTURE: Come back to learn how to develop influence. To become a leader, it’s important to develop influence in a way that empowers, elevates and enlightens others, always coming from a point of empathy and much generosity. It takes time, but it’s worth it—think about all the true leaders you admire and their journey to the top!
Know someone who wants to learn more about leadership? Please share this post and the upcoming ones in this miniseries, thank you! Email, Facebook or Twitter.
by Helena Escalante | Goals, Growth, Habits, Leadership, Mindset, Miniseries, Planning, Tools
Estimated reading time: 3 minutes, 36 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: 3 Things all good listeners do – Part 4
— From What Got You Here Won’t Get You There: How Successful People Become Even More Successful by Marshall Goldsmith
In this miniseries, we’ve learned that good listeners (1) think before they speak, (2) listen with respect, and (3) ask “Is it worth it?” before answering. This is all incredibly simple, yet you’ll likely agree with me that it’s not easy.
Marshall Goldsmith, author of What Got You Here Won’t Get You There, says, “The only difference between us and the super-successful among us—the near-great and the great—is that the great ones do this all the time. It’s automatic for them… there’s no on and off switch for caring and empathy and showing respect. It’s always on… They treat everybody equally—and everyone eventually notices.”
“The weird part here,” Goldsmith goes on, “is that all of us, at every level of success, already know this. […] We already believe it. The question is: Why don’t we do it? Answer: We forget. We get distracted. We don’t have the mental discipline to make it automatic.”
Since the majority of this skill involves listening, and listening requires discipline, Goldsmith developed a simple exercise to test listening skills. Try it for yourself. Close your eyes and count to 50 with one simple goal: you cannot let another thought intrude into your mind; you must concentrate on keeping the count.
More than half of Goldsmith’s clients can’t do this. Around 20 or 30 other thoughts start to invade. While this seems as an exercise in concentration, it’s really a test of listening. “After all,” Goldsmith points out, “if you can’t listen to yourself (someone you presumably like and respect) as you count to 50, how will you ever be able to listen to another person?”
Just as you get limber by stretching your muscles every day, the more you do this exercise, the more you’ll be able to count to 50 without being easily distracted. “This newfound power of concentration will make you a better listener. After that, you’re ready for a test drive.” So, go make your next interaction an exercise in making the person you’re with feel like the only one in the room, whether that’s your spouse, a colleague or a total stranger.
Goldsmith has put together this list of tactics as a cheat sheet—keep it handy!
- Don’t interrupt.
- Don’t finish the other person’s sentences.
- Don’t say “I knew that.”
- Don’t even agree with the other person (even if he praises you, just say “Thank you”).
- Don’t use the words “no,” “but,” and “however.”
- Don’t be distracted. Don’t let your eyes or attention wander elsewhere while the other person is talking.
- Maintain your end of the dialogue by asking intelligent questions that (a) show you’re paying attention, (b) move the conversation forward, and (c) require the other person to talk (while you listen).
- Eliminate any striving to impress the other person with how smart or funny you are. Your only aim is to let the other person feel that he or she is accomplishing that.
If you can do all of the above, Goldsmith says that you’ll uncover a glaring paradox: “The more you subsume your desire to shine, the more you will shine in the other person’s eyes.” And that is true because by fully listening, you’ll make people feel “like a million bucks in your presence, you’ll score a bulls-eye.”
The good thing to all this is that we already know how to listen and focus. Just think of when you go on a first date, or when you’re on a sales call, or in a meeting with your boss: very likely you will be focused and interested in what the other person is saying. The key, going forward, “[is] a matter of remembering to do it all the time.”
ACTION
TODAY: Do the 50-count test and see how far you can go. Don’t be discouraged if you don’t get far (I got to 27 and started wondering where my dog was…), the more you do it the better you’ll get.
FUTURE: Keep working on the 50-count exercise. Despite how far you go on it, review the cheat sheet and determine to apply as many of the concepts as possible until, as Goldsmith says, you remember to do it all the time.
Please share this post with someone who might be interested in refining his/her listening skills with this miniseries. Email, Facebook, Twitter. Thank you!
by Helena Escalante | Goals, Growth, Habits, Leadership, Mindset, Miniseries, Tools
Estimated reading time: 3 minutes, 50 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: 3 Things all good listeners do – Part 3
— From What Got You Here Won’t Get You There: How Successful People Become Even More Successful by Marshall Goldsmith
Welcome to another installment of this oh-so-simple but profoundly changing miniseries in listening. So far, we’ve learned that all good listeners: (1) think before they speak, and (2) listen with respect.
According to Marshall Goldsmith in his brilliant book What Got You Here Won’t Get You There, the third thing all good listeners do is not so obvious, and certainly not so simple as the other two.
What is it, you ask? Well, after fully listening while in conversation, good listeners ask themselves a difficult question before they answer:
3. “Is it worth it?”
Why is it difficult? Mainly because, “while we’re supposedly [listening], we’re actually busy composing what we’re going to say next,” says Goldsmith. Instead of racing ahead formulating our answer, we should fully to listen to what the other person is saying, then think about our answer, and—before uttering our response—we should ask ourselves Is it worth it?
This “forces [us] to consider what the other person will feel after hearing [our] response. It forces [us] to play at least two moves ahead. Not many people do that.”
“Asking, ‘Is it worth it?’ engages you in thinking beyond the discussion to consider (a) how the other person regards you, (b) what the other person will do afterwards, and (c) how that person will behave the next time you talk.”
Goldsmith points out, “When someone tells us something, we have a menu of options to fashion our response. Some of our responses are smart, some are stupid. Some are on point, some miss the point. Some will encourage the other person, some will discourage [him/her]. Some will make [the person] feel appreciated, some will not.”
“Think about the last time you floated an idea in a meeting and the most senior person in the room (assuming it wasn’t you) ripped you for saying it. It doesn’t matter whether your idea was dumb and the other person’s response was brilliant—or vice versa. Just think about how you felt. Did you think more highly of the other person saying it? Did it make you appreciate anew that person’s tremendous listening skills? Did it inspire you to go back to your work with fresh enthusiasm? Did it make you more eager to speak up the next time you were in a meeting with that person? I’d wager the answers are no, no, no, and no.”
And this is precisely the consequence of responding without asking Is it worth it? “People not only think you don’t listen, but you have instigated a three-part chain of consequences: (1) they are hurt; (2) they harbor ill feelings toward the person who inflicted the hurt (i.e. they hate you); and (3) in the predictable response to negative reinforcement, they are less likely to repeat the event (i.e., they won’t speak up next time).”
This is hardly the formula for successful leadership. In the words of one of Goldsmith’s coaching clients who is the CEO of a multi-billion dollar company: “Before speaking, I take a breath and ask myself… ‘Is it worth it?’ …[Even if] what I was going to say was correct—maybe—saying it wasn’t worth it.”
Asking Is it worth it? opens up the possibility of considering many alternatives:
- Do we speak or shut up?
- Do we argue or simply say, ‘Thank you’?
- Do we add our needless two cents or bite our tongue?
- Do we rate the comments or simply acknowledge them?
While nobody can tell you what to say, particularly in a challenging situation or a tense meeting, asking Is it worth it? will give you the red light to stop, the yellow light to consider alternatives, or the green light to speak freely.
As you can see, great listeners use empathy every step of the way. By taking into account the other person’s thoughts and feelings by asking Is it worth it? you too will be engaging in a “profound consequential leap of thought,” says Goldsmith. “Suddenly you are seeing the bigger picture.”
These are the three things that all good listeners do. Come back tomorrow for the last part of this miniseries so that you can see how to tie it all together. You’ll learn a simple listening exercise to help you get stronger in this area.
See you mañana!
ACTION
TODAY: Make a point of asking Is it worth it? many times throughout your interactions today.
FUTURE: Make habit of incorporating this question as part of your listening toolkit. It’ll be worth it! 😉
Please share this post with someone who might be interested in refining his/her listening skills with this miniseries. Email, Facebook, Twitter. Thank you!
by Helena Escalante | Goals, Growth, Habits, Leadership, Mindset, Miniseries, Tools
Estimated reading time: 3 minutes, 17 seconds.
TODAY’S IDEA: 3 Things all good listeners do – Part 2
— From What Got You Here Won’t Get You There: How Successful People Become Even More Successful by Marshall Goldsmith
Yesterday we learned how important it is to think before we speak. Today we will focus on the second thing that good listeners do:
2. Listen with respect.
“To learn from people, you have to listen to them with respect,” says Marshall Goldsmith, author of What Got You Here Won’t Get You There.
Sounds too simple? It’s easier said than done. Think about this common scenario: “You’re reading a book, watching TV, or shuffling papers while your significant other is talking to you. Suddenly you hear, ‘You’re not listening to me.’ You look up and say, ‘Yes, I am.’ And calmly provide a verbatim playback of everything said to prove that you were listening and that your companion in life is … wrong.”
Goldsmith goes on to ask, “What have you accomplished by this virtuosic display of your multitasking skills? Was it smart? No. Does your partner think more highly of you? Not likely. Is anyone impressed? Hardly. The only thing going through your partner’s mind is, ‘Gee, I thought you weren’t listening. But now I realize it’s a much deeper issue. You’re a complete jerk.’ ”
Fortunately, in this case, there’s love, understanding, patience and forgiveness (I hope) in your relationship. But, what about at the office or anywhere else? What is your reaction when your boss, a colleague, or the clerk at the DMV continue to type and keep looking at their computer when you are in front of them asking or telling them something? And they don’t even bother to look at you while they say, ‘I’m listening, I’m listening,’ as they keep typing away…
Nobody likes that.
“This is what happens when we listen without showing respect,” says Goldsmith. As you can see it is much more frequent than we think it is. “It’s not enough to keep our ears open; we have to demonstrate that we are totally engaged.”
So, let’s now turn this back on us: how many times have we done this?
…Oops!
The saying goes that we judge others by their actions but we judge ourselves by our intentions. Clearly, our intention was never to be disrespectful: maybe we thought we could multitask by working on an urgent report while listening to our colleague… Yet the outward manifestation of that intention was plain rudeness towards our colleague, since he/she had no clue about our intention.
Having the right intention is not enough when listening to our loved ones or anyone else. We must convey with our attitude, behavior, and body language how important the other person is for us at that moment. And if we cannot devote attention to them right then, we should let them know—respectfully—and then go back to what we were doing.
Leaders everywhere know how to listen respectfully, actively and intentionally. They make you feel as if you are the only person in the room. Their eyes are locked on you and their body language says that they care about what you are saying.
“The ability to make a person feel that, when you’re with that person he or she is the most important (and the only) person in the room is the skill that separates the great from the near-great.”
Stay tuned for tomorrow’s Part 3: you will learn the one question that changes the whole conversation and its consequences.
ACTION
TODAY: Practice listening with respect. Give your full attention to the other person. Don’t be formulating your response before he/she ends speaking. If you need a brief pause once the person is done speaking (and it feels too awkward to keep quiet), simply say, “give me a second, please, I’m thinking about what you said,” and then organize your ideas and respond.
FUTURE: Practice listening with respect. Practice, practice, practice, until the habit is ingrained.
Please share this post with someone who might be interested in refining his/her listening skills with this miniseries. Email, Facebook, Twitter. Thank you!
